tales from a trivial twenty-something

maybe she's born with it

2009-08-24T19:20:00.000-07:00

karl fidgets in his seat at Cheesecake Factory...

He straightens the napkin on his lap and sits up straight.
He looks up a little, daydreaming of something.

I smile. "What are you anticipating?"

He turns to look at me. "How do you know I'm anticipating something? How do you know these things?!"

I laugh. I laugh because I know him more than anyone else. And I know him more than anyone else because I love him.

BTW, he was totally anticipating the arrival of the Tiramisu cake we ordered. ;)

pick a cube

2009-08-10T11:33:00.000-07:00

yeah, this was pretty much amazing. Go ahead and try it.

Name: marissa
Date: 8/10/2009
Colorgenics Number: 45107263

You have a vivid imagination and this is good. Great inventors, explorers all had inventive, imaginative minds. Your friends and acquaintances may consider you over-imaginative and given to fantasy or day-dreaming. So what ? this is a part of your character and charm.

Being a somewhat gentle, emotional and sensitive person, you are at this time experiencing a considerable amount of tension. What you really need is someone who can be close to you and to listen to what you have to say.

The present situation, not of your making, is forcing you to compromise. You will have to hold back and forgo some of your hopes, dreams and aspirations.

There is considerable amount of stress present in your life at this time and this is perhaps due to some considerable mental and physical frustration. There are various physical needs that are necessary for your well-being but whatever the reasons - mostly of your own making - your needs are not being fulfilled. We wonder why? You are under the impression that nobody seems to care for you. This predicament is most uncomfortable and it is because of this that you are experiencing far more stress than you feel you can cope with. You need to find a soul mate - someone who truly understands you and whose standards are as high as your own. As matters stand you would like to break away from the vicious cycle that you find yourself entrapped but this is easier said than done. You refuse to compromise with your opinions and essentially you are unable to resolve the situation because you are continually postponing the making of the necessary decision. You are stubborn but this should be no deterrent experiencing a happy life.

You feel utterly wretched - worn out. The demands that other people have been making on you have depleted your strength and stamina. You feel powerless to try to remedy the situation on your own and you are looking for what is hopefully known as 'divine intervention'. But be assured your salvation lies in yourself - you have the ability so use it.

FIND YOURSELF.

silly texts

2009-07-27T23:03:00.000-07:00

i just wanted a record of these before I deleted them from my phone. =)

r: AHH I'M A HO

n: Ha. Yea. I'm retarded. I grabbed my bag for some reason. It's my ADD. Ha. Get it in like five minutes after I flip a bitch.

f: School is the coldest bitch I've ever known.

f: Have the objects of my heartbreak been collected yet?

c: Hellooooo my favorite roooooomies in the whole wide world.....

c: We neeeeeeeda have a summmer partyyy!

k: Silly billy. its chilly. shop at tillys.

f: Bao vinh and his cousin are talking in french and it sounds so cool!

b: HAHA sure princess =)

f: lol i know! Did u see your note? lol i didn't even know they were here til i peed at like 4. Btw...did u even sleep?!? Your lights were still on!

f: Gimme that job so we can giggle together as we work haha...jk k rest now booo.

f: haha yayyy! see u at home mamacitaaa!

k: i know what you were doing. you were saving it for a date with me.

Okay. BALEEEEEETED!

blast from the past

2009-07-11T13:12:00.000-07:00

let me lay out this scenario for you. The Ho goes to a family bbq, where she meets her cousin's friends. She begins to talk to one of these friends and creates a nice friendly bond with him. Through texts, the Ho and this one guy chat up a storm, asking each other random questions and such. It's a simple acquaintance.

I ask about him and find out his name. No clue whatsoever. She tells me his hobbies and where he went to school. I discover he went to college with my own cousin. Peculiar. Heading on to facebook, we try to determine more things about the guy. Private profile. Damn.

A few days later, I ask my own cousin about the guy. And this is how it went down:

m: oh question
i: wats up
m: do you know a ____ ____?
i: yeaaaa remember? U dated him? lol
m: asdgasdrga;sidhf;aksjhgd NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
i: ahahaha well u guys had a thing
m: *&#!#(%*^@%#!
i: remember? like a LITTLE thinggg
m: ok wait wait wait
i: U guys met up at the carnival and s***
m: wow, i TOTALLY forgot about that lol, blast from the f***ing past lol
i: hahaha i know right!!!
m: so tell me, because i honestly don't remember, what happened again? lol
i: hahaha well i think i was like a matchmaker or something cuz he liked me first
m: i remember...
i: but i didn't, so i introduced u guys
m: -_____-
i: and u started talking online and the time u guys met at the carnival for the first timeee
m: the ONLY time lol
i: yeaaaa lol
m: yeah but do u remember what happened after?
i: no, it got awkward? lol and u guys stopped talkin
m: yeah....i don't remember lol, how f***ing hilarious.
i: hehe small world O_O

UGHHHHHHHHHHHH. I must've erased that portion of my life from my memory for some reason.

avada kedavra vs faith

2009-06-29T10:51:00.000-07:00

a little thing called faith has kept me going the past few weeks. I'm not quite sure why I've neglected it for quite some time, but when replenished, it truly is something to be in awe of. I lost touch with Him for maybe 2 years and yet, He still pulls through with my prayers. I passed spring quarter better than I expected and it's all because of Him. So PTL for faith. I'm sticking to my religious roots.

On a sillier note, I love Cynthia:
m: Alright, I will see you back at the apartment wifey!
c: Haha, I expect a hot dinner on the table
m: What if I was naked on the kitchen counter with sushi covering my special lady parts? Haha hot enough for ya? lmao
c: Only if it's homemade sushi haha

As for what the summer has blessed me with, it's a painstakingly horrendous amount of organic chemistry. My Tuesdays and Thursdays are free...free to work and earn that cash a broke college student yearns for. My Mondays and Wednesdays are absolutely insane. Chem lecture takes up my morning; chem lab lecture/chem discussion take up my noontime; and chem lab consumes my afternoon in 4 hours. Second session is going to be a pain. Not only will I have even more organic chemistry to deal with, I get to top off the last half of my summer with calculus. Someone, anyone, have your wand at the ready and when I tell you, yell out "Avada Kedavra!" But then again, it's all about the faith. Keep the faith. Go listen to Miley Cyrus' song The Climb. I've actually taken a liking to it. I know! I shock myself too!

In other news, my roommates and I have put a hold on a 2-story townhouse nearby and, to tell you the truth, it's pretty legit. It's actually amazing to think about. I didn't know anyone in my hall the first year of college (with the exception of my childhood friend). And yet, here I am, rooming with some of the coolest people I've met and who I never knew before 2 years ago (with the exception of my high school friend). I get to room (in this case, in the same room) with someone who I met during the first and foremost crucial days of college life. Not to mention rooming (in this case, in the same residence) with a silly person from high school, a person of whom I have yet to truly get to know (although I do know she enjoys the same passion of Urban Outfitters as I do), and probably the smartest person I've met these past few years (we're talking about 4.0, straight A PLUSES, yeah, PLUSES). Just looking back, it's all pretty much "mind-bottling."

Speaking of the past and reminiscing on old memories, starting in approximately 2 months (beginning when I move in to the new abode), I will be packing up and moving my thoughts and hopefully my more artistic self to a new blog. Indeed. It will be a momentous occasion. I'll be updating more (maybe) and throwing some pictures, videos, quotes, polaroids, recipes, lyrics, songs and poems at you. So we'll see how that goes. So I guess I'll be summing up what this blog meant to me and how it has given me something to hold on to within the next few weeks or so. I hope, it's my only wish really, that you've enjoyed or have gotten something out of what you've read here. If not...bummer.

kix and karl

2009-06-04T00:41:00.000-07:00

over the past few days, I felt rather empty; empty in the sense that stuff has been pretty much monotonous and predictable. However, just recently, it has occurred to me that it is the simple pleasures in life that have kept me sane. I told myself a long time ago that I appreciated these simple things and yet, I have forgotten about them until now.

I walked into the kitchen this morning and rummaged through our desert of a kitchen and found a cereal box of Kix. I used to think that Lucky Charms and Cocoa Pebbles, even Froot Loops, were the best cereals out there but I realized all of them were sugar-filled and contained some sort of wacky color. And then there's Kix. To tell you the truth, it wasn't something I would jump for in the cereal aisle at the grocery store. But today, it looked rather appealling. I took it down from on top of the fridge and poured myself a bowl accompanied with some milk. Boy, was that tasty. It was this simple experience that I thoroughly enjoyed that made me recognize how much I was missing if I spent my life focusing on things I've already tried. Kix was absolutely delcious. It's my new favorite.

And then there's Karl. Honestly, there wasn't much to appreciate other than the fact of his birth at the end of May. Hah. Our relationship has been somewhat steady and what we have felt right. I was having a deep and meaningful conversation with my roommate and we came to the conclusion that our boyfriends are actually very good men. They're good men to us, even if we may not see it. I closed my eyes tonight and realized that Karl has been a better boyfriend than most of the couples I've seen and met. He takes care of me and protects me, pays for me, and doesn't let me down. And I appreciate all of it, all of him. But above all, I love his patience to deal with my girlish tendencies. He makes me feel so special.

That's why my roommate and I are planning a small "appreciation" gift for our boyfriends. Stuff in the mix include homemade candlelit dinner and naming a star after them. Either way, I love you and I always will. <3

hopeless romantic

2009-05-29T09:38:00.000-07:00

upon looking up cute things to wear to the park, I came across this:

Sweet Romantic Things to Do for Your Sweetheart
By Kathryn D'Imperio

1. Leave little love notes or piles of candy when you visit each other. Stash them away where your honey will be sure to find them, whether in the car, under his/her pillow or in a travel bag.

2. Call just because you are thinking of him or her, leave a cute message in the voicemail or send a text message with a sweet or seductive meaning. If you prefer to leave a message as opposed to talking, call when you know he or she is unavailable so a little something sweet is waiting upon return to the cell phone, home or office.

3. Send an email, or better yet, get old-fashioned and send a letter or a card through the mail to express your love. After all, who doesn't love getting mail (well, except for bills!) as a surprise?

4. When you are getting together for an evening or even for just a few minutes, pick up his or her favorite treat or snack, a specialty coffee or dessert as a sweet surprise. If you are going to rent a movie or spend some quiet time at home, get a few snacks to enjoy with a flick or some television.

5. Speaking of renting movies, surprise your sweetheart with a movie you pick out that you know he or she would really enjoy. I often have a difficult time making up my mind about which movie to rent, so it would definitely be a huge but much appreciated step if I brought one over that I knew he would like.

6. You know those sweet things you think of when you are together or just thinking about your honey? Well, next time a thought pops in your mind, voice it! Girls especially love to know what wonderful things go on in the inner workings of their guys minds, so chances are, guys may also enjoy a few catch phrases.

7. When you spend time together, help each other out with chores to free up more time to spend together. Sometimes lending a hand can even be fun when you are both working together.

8. Swap massages, or simply give your partner a massage if you get the idea that he or she has had a long day. Foot massages and back rubs can do wonders for relaxing people and alleviating stress. Many males seem to enjoy having their backs gently scratched or rubbed softly as a means of helping them to relax.

9. Bring home take-out from a favorite dining establishment after a long day so the two of you can enjoy some food in the comfort of your own home. It isn't quite as romantic as cooking it yourself, but it is definitely a nice gesture.

10. Pick wildflowers or give a single rose or carnation for no reason. I even found a four-leaf clover once to give to my sweetheart.

12. Do something you may not want to, simply because it is important to him or her. This can be anything from attending a show or an event to doing a chore, giving up a bad habit or just trying something new. Find out what is important to him or her if you don't already know, and make it happen.

13. Spend time with his or her family. The seriousness of a relationship can sometimes be gauged by how one interacts with his or her partners family. Spending time at your honey's family's home can also serve to strengthen your relationship.

14. Spend extra time getting ready; dress up or wear something that you know your sweetheart loves to see on you.

15. Snuggle up and take a nap together. There is nothing quite like falling asleep and waking up in the arms of the one you love.

16. Play romantic music and dance together. Slowly dancing around the room to a favorite song can mean so much more when it is completely unexpected.

17. Go on a picnic! Gather your favorite foods, drinks and desserts, a comfortable blanket and some utensils, plates, cups and napkins and head out for the park on a beautiful day. Go for a walk in the park while you are there and enjoy all of the nature around you.

18. Carry his or her photo in your wallet. Keep your sweetie present at all times by putting a photo of him/her or the two of you together in your wallet, at work, in your car or wherever you think you would most like to see it.

19. Find and make recipes you enjoy together!

20. Share your daydreams. Whatever makes your heart soar at thoughts of the future, consider sharing those ideas with your special one. Daydreaming together can be a very romantic and emotional experience, whether it is fully in jest or in a degree of serious contemplation.

21. Spray a little bit of your perfume or cologne on his or her pillow. You will be on each others' minds to begin with, but the lingering scent after you have gone separate ways for the night will bring sweeter dreams than usual.

22. Bring your sweetheart to visit places you came to know and love in your childhood. Parks, playgrounds, the zoo, pumpkin patches, museums, amusement parks, beaches, boardwalks and any other attractions that you enjoyed as a child can bring back happy memories to share with your significant other.

<3
Am I a hopeless romantic or what?

PS. It's my boo's birthday tomorrow! =)

hell week

2009-05-26T02:24:00.000-07:00

these next few days/weeks are going to be a major pain in me arse. Here's hopin' for the best. I'm serious.

- AfAm readings *FAILURE
- talk to a counselor *MAYBE NOT
- fall registration *DONE
- making monies *IN PROCESS
- baking cookies *EXTREMELY HARD
- do laundry *I NEED $5
- philosophy questions
- psych readings
- participate in AfAm discussion
- find a legit bakery *CHECK
- thank Christopher for the gajillionth time
- zomgwtfbbq
- see Karl drift @ HTF?
- STUDY FOR FINALS
- save money *EPIC FAIL

It's going to be hard to enjoy life while school is still in session. Then I get a week off. Then it's off to study organic chemistry at its best. Then second day of summer school = THE TONIGHT SHOW WITH CONAN O'BRIEN. That should be a little breather.

riled up

2009-05-24T23:48:00.000-07:00

fanboys...and fangirls.

j: rogue leader
m: first of all, i'm not ten. nor am i that ugly lol
j: hahhahahah
j: loll
j: trekkie
m: what's that supposed to mean
j: it's a derogatory word
m: are you calling me a trekkie
j: yes, yes i am
m: and what are you
j: i'm the one with the force
m: PFFFT you are the furthest thing from "the one with the force"
j: oh yea?
m: i'm not the one who bought la forge's sunglasses
m: IN YOUR FACE
m: and who the f*ck brings a lightsaber to a star trek movie
j: it was on my face
m: you might as well get out of the theater
j: hahahaha
j: i was using the force on all the viewers
m: so don't be trekkie me
m: because you have conflicting ideologies
j: wow you really are taking this seriously huh
j: hahahahaha lol omg
m: -_______-
m: i'm proving a point
j: and i was just talking about the movie
j: hoping you'd respond to it
m: well i'm sorry but i got real riled up for that one
j: hahahhahahah
j: i like your passion
m: good. because my heart was pumped for that one.

ps. 5 things done from the grocery list.

remedy for rage

2009-05-22T11:00:00.000-07:00

shopping. I bet you saw that one coming.

I just need to get away. At least window shop. Maybe get started on my grocery list. Take my mind off things. Then get started on homework and studying for finals. Woot.

_edit.

So, surprisingly, I didn't make any large purchases (as opposed to Frances). Hit up Nordstrom for some MAC, bought a raunchy bra at VS, exchanged a ring for a hoodie at UO, and scored some earrings at XXI. Not too shabby. Frances, on the other hand, bought four new outfits at XXI, which I'm borrowing in the near future. The very near future. My future room-roomie has got style.

animosity in a venti please

2009-05-22T10:19:00.000-07:00

ugh. Sometimes I just really hate some people. There may be times when I dislike characteristics of the person, but at times, it comes to the point where I just really don't like you. At all. You're pretty much spam to me (She's All That reference). I'm not some person you go to conceal your secretive plans. I'm freaking sick of it. Here's a thought: why don't you just tell everyone where you're really going and save MYself the trouble of having me think about inching closer to my phone to call the "authorities." Yeah, I understand that they're all strict and what not, but it's not a reason for you to put this burden upon others, especially me. Do you ever wonder why they're so strict? HMMMM. Maybe because they have a CLEAR idea of what the hell you do and why you dress the way you do or pile on the make-up. I don't want to be your getaway. One of these days, you're going to get caught. And honestly, I can't wait for that moment. You may think that it's all good and I know that you won't get me in trouble, but HELLO. It's all about YOU YOU YOU. Learn a little respect and maybe be more concerned with other people and how you treat them. Think about what they're feeling for once. I hate taking care of you during these times because these are the times when you need to seriously grow up.

I'm cross with you. Yeah, I'm pretty pissed.

VENTI SIZED.

grocery list

2009-05-19T01:10:00.000-07:00

here are a few minor goals I hope to achieve within the coming days:

- boy meets girl rouched tunic
- rapscallion by samantha pleet denim romper
- kimchi blue cinema swimsuit
- jeffrey campbell crosshatch platform
- get my nails done
- maybe a trim of some split-ends
- baby blue comfy ass sweater
- mac slimshine lipstick
- lash blast
- develop 120 film
- honey nut cheerios
- eggs
- salmon for frances
- special ingredients for a special project for a special someone

Yeah...I don't think my next paycheck is going to cover all of this.

live long and prosper

2009-05-18T17:39:00.000-07:00

conan o'brien, you are my bitch lover. I get the pleasure of being in his presence at the end of June. Excited? Oui. What to wear, what to wear, what to wear?! TV show tapings are just plain awesome.

Life has treated me well as of late: an expected A on my philosophy midterm; a surprising A on my afam midterm; good hair days; free merch credit for some new clothing; happy run-ins with old co-workers; Star Trek in IMAX; passionfruit green tea runs; quality time with the boyfriend; no more overdraft fees; newfound gratitude for old never-really-worn clothes; etc.

There have been a few bumps in the road like the occasional person who has been getting on my nerves. It's like having another one of those. ARGH. But no worries, hopefully the lock on my door will keep people away. But then again, maybe it's the fresh air I need.

France-Ass and I are thinking about getting bunk beds next year. Chewy on the bottom bunk!

So after that whole KFC craze (had free meals for two days straight), I'm turning back to pescatarianism to totally pwn our bet. And to make matters better, I have been working out with one of my roommates, so thank goodness for that motivation. Lunges are a real pain.

Summer is almost here. Can you smell that? That's the smell of two 5-week sessions of organic chemistry for me. Tasty. Not to mention the accompanying labs and a calculus class. God help me.

ps. As soon as I get my next paycheck, or maybe my next next paycheck, I will develop my 120 film. I really want to see how they turned out. Too bad I can't find any color 120 film. =(

dear deborah

2009-04-28T17:17:00.001-07:00

i feel as if I have no way to contact you other than here. Well, there's facebook, indeed, but how impersonal it would be to leave a wall post. Rather, I am determined to make my sentiments known here. =) Seeing as how you've stayed a devoted trivial teenager reader.

In regards to you missing your piano:
I've actually been spending some quality time with the piano back home lately. I've been home for like three weekends straight. I think my parents are probably annoyed of me by now. (Or not.) BUT, nevertheless, I missed the piano. I'm basically the only one playing with it now. And I am in SOME SERIOUS need for new sheet music. I am still on the lookout for the Amelie sheet music.

In regards to you watching Gilmore Girls:
ZOMG. I don't know what I was doing when this show first appeared on the WB. Where was I?! Probably watching something lame like Zaboomafoo. ARGH. But I must admit, catching up on the seasons of this show over and over again is just a pleasant way to get away from life. I'm pretty much in love with Jess. I was never really a fan of Dean or Logan. But you know what, after watching how Logan and Rory got together, I'm starting to like him even more. But Jess will pwn as usual. I'm just sayin', Logan isn't so bad. :)

In regards to your encouragement for a new me:
Thanks, babe. I hope I can. Maybe I'll talk to you and the Villena elder about my academic struggles sometime. =/ It's getting pretty bad. Let's just say I'm going to be disappointing the parentals because I'm FOR SURE switching majors. I'm scared they'll wring my neck or probably send me to the guillotine. No, maybe a firing squad. Or maybe a major wet willy. Any of those would be truly frightening.

In regards to my newfound passion for pescatarianism:
Indeed, it truly is rewarding, I must say. I was thinking about vegetarianism but I really don't think I can do it. LOL You don't understand, after a week, I was craving a steak bowl at Chipotle. But, please do send me those recipes! I would LOVE to try them out! I feel like I will never develop a passion for tofu, it's just not in the stars for me. And when you said "vegan 'meats'," I basically melted, I would love to know more about that. Not because it's "meat," but because, well, just ask Villena de Mayor how much I love my food. <3

Horribly broke and pretty hungry,
VANILLA.

a new me

2009-04-24T10:11:00.000-07:00

i've thrown away all indiscretions. I think it's time to really step up the game. It's time for a change. I've taken college for granted a little too much. Heck, A LOT too much. Starting now, it's all going to change. Wish me luck.

Otherwise... X.X

And that's not a good thing.

on a roll

2009-04-22T15:51:00.000-07:00

three posts within a few minutes. I don't know, I've just had a lot on my mind. To further complicate things, or not, last night I had a dream.

I was at Albertson's and I was in the wine/alcohol aisle. I was just strolling around, and I picked up a rack of Tecate Light. (WTF.) I headed over to the self-checkout machine and paid for it using my card. The screen showed a print-out of my receipt, which I noticed was pretty darn long. Didn't pay attention to it and decided to accept. The guy who was supposed to check my receipt didn't even bother to look at ID or anything. As I left and got back to my apartment, I looked at the receipt and it was about pages long. It straight up said that I was to attend a court hearing for the purchase of alcohol under the legal age. O.O I was FUH-REA-KING out. I even woke up freaking out because I KNOW that I went to Albertson's yesterday just to buy some fish (btw, I'm turning to pescatarianism, going on 6 days without meat, yay me) and salad. I wasn't sure if I subconsciously bought some Mexican beer on the way out.

It was somewhat of a nightmare.

But no worries, 2009 will be the year.

This year, I can legally buy and consume alcoholic beverages, fearlessly walk down the liquor aisle, and I don't know, go to VEGAS. Rent a hotel room. Go to a 21+ club. Whatevs.

the alcocer anecdotes 12

2009-04-22T15:29:00.000-07:00

mini post. It's been sitting in my notepad on my phone for ages.

Episode 12: Shrooms

m: how's life
d: amazing, u?
m: spectacular
d: why did u one-up me?
m: because those mushrooms are the best kind.
d: -_-

a slap to the face

2009-04-22T15:26:00.001-07:00

reality bites. I've been pretty much living in my own little world and I didn't realize I had it so good until now.

Lately, I've been feeling rather overwhelmed with so much. I won't go into detail, but my heart has been feeling rather stressed out as of late. I ache...

I think the two things I need right now are independence and determination. Everything else should be the least of my worries.

Oh. And more work days. -__-

the alcocer anecdotes 11

2009-04-15T11:09:00.000-07:00

his take on our fellow furry friend...

Episode 11: The Easter Bunny

d: <_<
m: hiii
m: happy easter
d: merry easter [=
m: what's up
d: oh nothin
d: havin a bit of a downer day
d: but i plan to rebound quickly come tomorrow
d: how about u
m: why?
m: it's easter!
d: lame stuff haha
d: easter is a very odd holiday
m: are you catholic/christian?
d: not particularly
m: what does that mean lol
d: i "believe" in certain things that I have picked up from those religions
m: ohhh roight
d: lol
m: well don't be down
m: the easter bunny will come and visit you lol
d: if the easter bunny came and visited me
d: i'd punch it straight in the chest
d: haha jk =p
m: BUMMER.
d: exactly
m: I think that's what I'd say if I was in a bunny costume and someone socked me in the chest. Then I'd fall on my knees, then on my face.
d: LOLOLOL
d: omg as I read that, I pictured it all happen...Thank you. That gave me a great laugh lol
m: =)
d: (:

love utopia

2009-04-06T14:39:00.000-07:00

is it weird to want a love like Lorelai and Luke's? =) Is it weird to get butterflies in your tummy whenever you watch the sweet side of Jess' love for Rory?

Hi, I'm Marissa and I'm a Gilmore Girls addict. Forever.

I swear, I will never get tired of this show. I pretty much devote an hour of my life each weekday in order to witness the small town life of Stars Hollow. It's my utopia.

short post

2009-04-04T13:18:00.000-07:00

i'd figure out a way to be meaningful to you whilst doing my passion. But that's just me.

philosophical pwnage

2009-04-02T23:04:00.000-07:00

realistically, sure, I worry about my future and what it has in store for me. I wonder where I'm going and whether I'm making the right decisions in life. I wonder about petty things like why I haven't finished reading my leisure books or why I made the purchases that I did. But that's beside the fact that I really don't know what I'll be doing within the next few years.

He called me last night and told me that his boss wanted to talk to me, which is weird because I've never met the guy and work is work. I stay out of his work and he stays out of mine. Our employment careers don't exactly have anything in common. It came as a shock to me when he told me that some stranger wanted to speak to someone like me. I'm not much for socializing with complete, complete, strangers and it felt odd that our jobs would clash in the way that they did. He told me that his boss, we shall call him Mr. Bossman, wanted to expand more on what he will be doing in the recent days, weeks, years perhaps. I hesitantly accepted to meet with him and I brought one of my other friends as reinforcements ("hesitantly" being the keyword because I had a buttload of philosophy reading to do that night as well as study questions). The meeting was set to approximately 9:30 pm. Ask me what time Mr. Bossman came, just ask me. No. You're wrong. He came at around 11 o'clock. That is almost 2 hours, maybe about 2 hours, of me and my reinforcement (plus him) waiting; just waiting in the cold wee hours of the night. The chilliness of the night started to strike my body as I started to shiver almost uncontrollably.

When Mr. Bossman finally arrived, he came with another fellow of the same business, dressed in ties and fancy shmancy office suits. Yeah, real legit. The rest was kind of a blur. I zoned out for most of his presentation, but basically, to sum it all up for you, all I heard was "money...money...I have a Porsche...money...you'll get a BMW...money...money...then you'll get a Bentley...money." And that night, all I could think about is how could someone like this get him to do a job like this; this pyramid scheme dealing with market networking. I zoned out only due to the fact that I'm not really a business-minded kind of gal, but I understood where Mr. Bossman was coming from. He had me questioning my future, which was what a good salesman does, and I was pretty befuddled that night. I was also pretty pissed at him for dragging me into this. But I was most sorry for my friend. He was sucked into the world of market networking against his will. One thing I don't like about salespeople are that they can be too pushy sometimes. If we don't want to do it, then don't let us do it. If we remain skeptical about it even after your presentations, then let us be skeptical. My friend ended up paying $600, money that he told me he didn't have. That fact just totally tied knots in my stomach. I couldn't believe me and my friend had been dragged into this. Just let us be.

This is where it gets interesting. Well, to me at least. Do you remember the philosophy reading that I had to do? The one that I could have been doing in leiu of this absolute waste of my time? When I got home at 12:30 am, all I could do was push through those pages in Aristotle's Nicomachean Ethics book with as much determination as I had left. It was then that I came across this line:

"Suppose, then, that the things achievable by action have some end that we wish for because of itself, and because of which we wish for the other things, and that we do not choose everything because of something else--for if we do, it will go on without limit, so that desire will prove to be empty and futile."

I thought to myself, damn, what a perfect line to tell Mr. Bossman. After a few pages, Aristotle started to inquire about a human's highest good (goal) in life. What are human beings made to do? Eyes are made for sight. An education is the goal of studying at school. But what about us? What is the highest achievement we can possibly grasp, being both complete and self-sufficient?

Aristotle proposes that our highest good would have to be happiness. He then goes on to talk about the candidates of happiness--pleasure, honor, virtue, and finally wealth.

Wealth. Money.

"The moneymaker's life is in a way forced on him [not chosen for itself]; and clearly wealth is not the good we are seeking, since it is [merely] useful, [choiceworthy only] for some other end."

This totally boggled my mind because not only did Aristotle totally just call out Mr. Bossman, but he made the most complete sense in the world at that specific point in time, the perfect thing I needed to hear at that moment of my life. Happiness is not about wealth, people. Money is an instrumental good; one that achieves nothing more than other wanted things. It has no direct or ultimate value in life. It's not a supreme good because it is used for some other end. Aristotle is conveying the most simple message of all: the highest good is one that is complete and self-sufficient; one that is pursued for its own sake and makes a life worth living.

And that, my friends, is how Aristotle PWNED Mr. Bossman.

piano girl

2009-03-12T13:11:00.000-07:00

music has been something that I could always turn to whenever I'm feeling uninspired or just empty. Recently, I've been missing my piano. I couldn't bring that hunk of love with me to college, but my acoustic guitar made the cut. But I think my first love would have to be with those black and white keys. I haven't had a longing for them like this before. All I have is my tv and I watch all these movies with piano instrumentals that I want to play. I'm going to get started and get my music-yearning fingers on the Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium sheet music. Then, afterwards, find the Amelie sheet music. Yann Tiersen is just a genius. I've basically conquered the pieces I've wanted to learn from Pride & Prejudice, so I think it's time to move forward. And if you aren't busy, just go youtube a guy named daveisthemusic. He's pretty much the epitome of awesome and I'm addicted to him right now.

chocolate day

2009-03-09T22:21:00.000-07:00

too much chocolate in my diet today. As a college student, I ate chocolate mini muffins for breakfast. Then I had some hot chocolate at Starbucks after my lab final. And now, I'm about to bite into a chocolate croissant. Yikes. Why is chocolate so delicious?

I think it's time to start working out, which is funny because I might have said that many moons ago. Sigh. Maybe I should start saving up for a personal trainer. I think that would be pretty cool. But then again, I still have so much to save up for. Parking, books, a trip to Europe maybe, food, A LIFE. Ugh.

It's been a while since I last updated. Well, to sum up that gap, let's just say that the future pretty much exploded in my face. It's coming at me so fast that I'm not quite sure how to approach it. There are so many dimensions to it and it's really hard to just get a hold of. Hearing plans and ideas of the future totally freaks me out. I mean, I feel like I know what I want to do. It's just that choosing the path and succeeding is super hard. Super super hard. I think it has to do with my absence of the Lord in my life. I feel as if I was so much more at ease when I knew He was there beside me, someone there to rely on. I felt safe and secure. He helped me through so much in the past. I need to keep going to church to talk to Him. To ask Him for help. But now, I need Him to hold my hand through all of this "future stuff." I'd feel more at ease.

Sigh. Life sucks sometimes.

But then again, there's chocolate.

ostentatious wrist

2009-01-28T11:39:00.000-08:00

i don't know what it is, but recently, I've been bitten by the fashionable watch bug (if such a thing exists). I think my fetish began when I bought my Paul Frank calculator watch. I fell in love with it the moment I saw it online. I had to have it. And now I do. Wearing it to work, I got so many compliments on it. Too bad the site doesn't carry them anymore. Then, I was cleaning my room and found an old school vintage Walt Disney watch that belonged to my aunt back in the 70's. I tried it on and it fit perfectly on my wrist. It was like it was made for me. Mickey Mouse's hands are the hands of the clock and he just smiles at me and tells me the time. Now recently, I bought another watch. -__- It's pretty tight though, and cheap. It's a Cheapo watch. In hot pink. AYEEE. I can't wait to get it in the mail. AND THEN! I was reminiscing about the old days in elementary school when my best friend came back from vacation with a brand spankin' new Baby-G watch. And wow, did I fall in love with it. I think about all the girls in my 6th grade class had to have one. I bought a lavender one (which was soooo sick) and during debut practice, I let someone wear it, but I forget who. -__- So now I'm on the lookout for another Baby-G watch. Just wait til I get my paycheck...because this girl is motha effin' buh-roke, no joke.

sometimes

2009-01-26T02:52:00.000-08:00

relationships have their ups and downs. This conversation is an up:

k: i want to grab you and squeeze you tight
m: =( that's exactly what i want right now
m: i was thinking about that today
k: me too
k: why do you read people's blogs?
m: because they're interesting! lol
m: and i like pictures
k: i really don't understand them
k: how are they interesting
k: reading about someone else lol
k: maybe even someone you don't know
m: well it actually is better when you don't really know the person that well, because when you read the blog, then you find out more about them lol
k: b`gtvyhbnj gtbfv
k: you know what that was? ^^^
m: you smashing your head against the keyboard in frustration
k: ZOMG
k: how did you know????
k: LMAO
m: because i know my boo =)
k: hahahaha
k: that's awesome
k: that made me smile
m: good
k: you could have said hands, feet, ballz, but no
k: my head haha
m: =)
m: AND because i'd probably do the same thing if you said something weird to me lol
k: haha

I told ya, it's the little things that count. =)

hit on me

2009-01-25T21:48:00.000-08:00

oh, the tales I could tell about my experiences being hit on. The many times at the smoothie store and some at the clothing store I got hired at about 2 months ago. I think the most memorable person would have to be Chalb (names have be changed to protect privacy. Actually not really, it's pretty easy to figure out his name). The first time we met, he came in with his baggy black jeans and his over-sized white polo. He worked at the Quizno's next door. I always wondered why my female co-workers magically disappeared from the front of the store when he came around. He seemed pretty nice so I slapped on that Robeks smile and welcomed him into the smoothie world of Nutville. Now that I think about it, I shouldn't have done it. -_- I think I came off a little too nice. When his smoothie was expedited and he left, my co-workers mysteriously showed up on the floor. Apparently, the kid had a knack for hitting on the girls at Robeks. Okay, not hit on them, but be overly enthused. I didn't think it was such a big deal. After all, I was a taken woman. But then, I made my second mistake: I walked into Quizno's during my break and bought my craved longing that day--broccoli and cheese soup. Slurp, slurp. He was working (just my luck) and he was super excited I had showed up. He was trying to talk to me and what not, asking me questions about my life. Then, when it was time to pay (I had already busted out my cash), he said "Oh, it's on me." Okay, honestly, it's cool when guys have the decency to pay for you, but firstly, we weren't on a date, and secondly, eew. I told him that I really had to pay because it wasn't right, and he'd shove the money right back at me. (What a gentleman.) So, a little flustered, I said "alright," dropped the cash in the tip jar, and sped to the door. Now, this fool. ::rolls my eyes:: I had made my third mistake unintentionally, if that makes any sense. Another day, I was sweeping the front of the store--yes, sweeping--when he walks by. I swear, this guy gets turned on by anything. He stops walking, making his friends to stop walking too, and is all "Hey, do you need any help sweeping or anything?" I look up and kind of do that whole "uhhhh, are you serious?" face. "Uh, no thanks." "Are you sure?" "Yeah, I'm good." "Oh, alright, just let me know." WTF. To add to this hilarious tale of a hit-on, I found out he went to my church. I saw him during mass one time, and boy, was that awkward. The holidays soon came around, and Robeks puts up little stockings with each employee's name around the store. My manager, being the silly bean she is, tells me to look in my stocking for a surprise. I figured it was candy or a Christmas bonus would be swell too. But no. I found a folded-up paper with a note written inside. I won't go into details but it said something about how he gave the money in the tip jar as an offering at mass and how he'd like to get to know me better. It was super creepy. I showed my boyfriend this note and he came up with a rebuttal for it to put in the stocking. But the guy never came around to check my stocking again. Hah. I also got hit on by the employees at the Verizon store a few doors down from Robeks. That was pretty weird. Then there were those times at Urban Outfitters when I had greeted someone who took it as an overly-friendly gesture and started to talk to me. All I really wanted to do was welcome them and do my job so I could get paid. Haha. I find it interesting that when I worked at Robeks, guys called me cute or hot. But at UO, I get "You're beautiful." It's pretty nice knowing that I've reached a classier state of beauty; it's flattering. But sometimes, all you need are those words being said from the guy that means the most to you. =)

the sidekick stories 07

2009-01-22T21:38:00.000-08:00

from the eyes of my sidekick...I haven't captured some shots in a while. I'm trying to make up for lost times.

Welcome to UCI basketball.
Finding seats and keeping them was...kind of... a bitch.
Sponsored by Chipotle! And everyone knows how I love my Chipotle.
A bit tipsy after the game, are we? This is Frances showing off her little bucket of lollipops.
Cute UO outfit.
This is my Mama playing DDR.
This is Silly Cynthia and her heart-shaped sunglasses.
What a cutie.
The magnificent carousel right outside work.
Meet my 1 year old godson, Gabriel Matthew (aka Gabe)!
He would rather play with cardboard than a new colorful toy.
My soon-to-be new read.
One of the many pairs of sunglasses I possess.
At the park with my family.
My dad's Christmas present to my mom.
A climatic part of my day: reaching 166,000 miles.
Sephora's Orgasm Collection.
Karl's cute wrapping; he wrapped it himself. =)
Cute new sandal alert at UO!
What has the world come to?!
Hannah Montana cereal?!
HSM cereal?!
I'm trying to find a cute design for my bridesmaid dress for my cousin's wedding.
I think I'm going to go for the chic and slim look.

I'm sorry my life hasn't been extremely up to par lately. I just hope these will suffice. I'm just waiting for my Sidekick to mysteriously break within the upcoming weeks so I get a new phone. Oh, wait. My contract is expiring anyways. So either way, Blackberry Curve, here I come!

office space

2009-01-17T11:53:00.000-08:00

oooh, ouch. I haven't done one of these in a while. My sincerest apologies. It's just that I've been trying to assimilate myself into the new quarter along with work and just life in general. But! Look no further! An update on the tales from a trivial twenty-something is at hand!

Have you ever had those moments in traffic where things don't just go your way? The only time I can work during the week is from 5 or 6 until close. So you could imagine the traffic I get into when I actually enter the freeway. I'm actually glad that I don't have to be on it for such a long period of time, but even for those first everlasting minutes, I want to blow my brains out. Not only due to the fact that the cars are going negative miles per hour at a time, but because my iTunes consists of new Britney Spears songs and singing along to them may scare the drivers alongside me. It's like that scene from Office Space, where Peter is in traffic at the very beginning of the movie. He's in a lane where the cars are completely stopped and the lane next to him is speeding past. So, what do you do? You switch to the other lane, of course! But once you get in that lane, it stops. And you turn to look at your previous lane, and there it is, zooming past you. You just want to slam your head against the steering wheel and hope there better be some good shopping material you can work with when you get to your job. (Well, in my case, at least.)

As for my bank account, remember how I told myself (and kept reminding myself) to save the money that I had made? Well...that didn't work out so well. I have an amazing wardrobe to choose from...but my bank account has severely suffered the consequences.

I have been addicted to Passion Fruit Green Tea at Cha. The first time I bought a green tea there, it tasted somewhat of roses. There was this pungent odor to it, which was delightful, but not entirely to the sense of taste. It was like a liquefied version of a flower. But either my senses have been less acute lately, or I'm just craving things that were less desirable in the past. I'll go get some today before work. =)

Work. Work has been amazingly slow and it's actually pretty great to have somewhat of a break every now and then. People are less motivated to go shopping because there isn't anyone else to shop for but themselves. We are completely out of gift cards from the holiday season and I feel pretty bummed out when people do come in with the sole purpose to purchase one. I always have to break the news. There was, however, one day, yes one day...where I was stuck with dealing with two, yes two, wardrobe stylists. I was fortunate enough to not deal with one stylist the previous night, but she came back again the next day...boy, that was some intense stuff. But let me introduce the scene to you. So no one is in line; it was a slow day. I was tagging some go-backs when a slicked out Japanese dude with a nice black jacket and a cute UO-ed white girl came up to me and said, "Hi...we have to make some returns." Returns are always fun (NOT!) but they're manageable. I give them one of my charming smiles and ask them what they're returning. They reach down and pull up four, FOUR!, huge UO bags of clothes and shoes. I was flabbergasted. Upon noticing my reaction, the guy said, "I know. This is probably going to be THE longest receipt you have ever seen." So the guy busts out the receipt and sure enough, it was a colossal thing my eyes have ever withheld. So here I am, checking to see if everything was in order, and I look down to realize they're entire purchase was around $2,000. TWO THOUSAND DOLLARS. So as I'm doing this, I eavesdrop a little (I know, but hey, I'm a girl) and find out that they'll be doing a Jack's Mannequin fitting within the coming days. I thought that was pretty cool. I wondered who the clothes they were returning were for, or what celebrity had worn them or tried them on, but I figured they had to sign some confidentiality form. But hey, it's a cool thought. Among the things returned, there were some suspenders that I had wanted to buy earlier but had decided against it. But upon looking at them again, I realized I had to have it; not only because they were cute, but now these suspenders had been worn by some celebrity. I don't know who, but someone. =) I bought them once my shift ended. But anyways, back to the story. With my awesome luck, a line started to form in front of the register. Because of slow-paced days, they only put one person on registers and that lucky person just had to be me. I called in some back-up and one of my managers came to the rescue...in a few lengthy minutes. A lady in line was getting antsy (I don't like those kinds of customers) and she just HAD to speak her mind: "Why is there only one person ringing people up? Are any of you guys even open? I just want to know what's going on!" Thank the Lord that my manager stepped in just in time to hear that and thank Him again that she's somewhat of a bitch when she has to be; she calmly (not really, LOL) yelled out to the person: "She is handling a really large return!" And to sum everything up, after that HUGE return, I got to have my break and trust me, I savored each nanosecond I was free.

Okay, so you'd think that would be the end of a laborous day. No, it wasn't. Once I got back from my break, I thought everything would return back to normal. And don't get me wrong, it did...for a while. My manager comes up to me and said, "You will never guess who just came in right now." Curses, it was them again, wasn't it? What the hell. "The girl from yesterday." Alright, so I remembered her face, I just didn't really know what was really wrong with her until my manager told me that she was a wardrobe stylist for some indie film who had just exchanged a buttload of clothes/shoes/accessories the night before. It's as if these types of people time it perfectly, just right, so that they'd do all of THIS right before closing. Not to mention...her receipt?! Grand total of approximately $4,000. Life is good. (-___-)

I think that basically sums up my life for a while. Roommates have been great. Mama Chu is wonderful because she cooks pasta and other things for us. Planning out next year's apartment/roomie situation. Having a few shots with a few great friends. Going on cinematic adventures (Twilight! Oh yeah, I'm addicted to that now. Sigh. Why does Rob Pattinson as Edward Cullen have to be so gosh darn sexy? I predict this is going to be another "Freddie Prinze Jr. as Zack Siler from She's All That" obsession for me.). I've been taking pictures with my three awesome cameras. And my unknown celebrity suspenders were put to good use as a part of my nerd costume for Daniel's 20th birthday party. (The theme was plaid/flannel, but I did somewhat of a theme-within-the-theme sort of deal. Whatever, Frances did the same thing except she was an Indian.)

the alcocer anecdotes 10

2009-01-04T12:02:00.000-08:00

decisions, decisions, decisions.

Episode 10: Japan vs. Europe

m: peekaboo
d: hello
d: whenever you IM me, I get a mental smile
m: how does that feel, a mental smile
d: it feels like a regular smile
d: but i don't smile O:

~*~

d: happy new year
m: right back at'cha
d: 0:-)
m: did you do anything mind-boggling
d: drink!
m: splendid!
d: it did "boggle" my mind
d: technically
d: wah aboot u?
m: eh, snuggled in a blanket and watched phantom of the opera.
d: X:
d: and how was PotO?
m: wonderful as ever
m: I really wanna see it at pantages
m: but I wanted to see it in vegas
d: that sounds like fun @_@
d: soon u will be of vegas age
d: O:
m: I know, I'm planning on saving up for a trip to europe or japan for my 21st bday
m: I wanna drink with the irish men kekeke
d: if u ever went to japan b4 i did i would kill myself
m: hah I really wanna go
d: f u!! go to europe instead imo
d: =/
m: why
d: so i can go to japan first =p
m: nope!
d: =[

fml shifts

2008-12-19T04:41:00.000-08:00

good morning one and all. It's 4:41 in the morning of December 19, 2008. I would like to take this moment to wish my cousin a happy 21st birthday, but I'm pretty sure she's off doing what she does best: partying and clubbing. She would not even think about reading this on her birthday, but I would just like to say that the big two-one is a big deal. That's why she's spending the weekend in LOST VEGAS (my soon-to-be-tee). Good luck babe, and just party everything away.

As for me, I just spend my entire night putting shit away. I started work at 6 at night and ended at 245 this morning. WHOO HOO. You can imagine my excitement. I suppose that late night Starbucks field trip with the co-workers before we headed to "work" actually did work; which, to be honest, shouldn't even be surprising. But holy macrole, that was a lot of work.

BUT BUT BUT...

...to make things a little less stressful, it was pay day. =) A nice hefty paycheck is in my possession, just waiting to be deposited. Yay. That gets me super ecstatic.

AND AND AND...

...because I get out so damn late, it's so cold and dark outside. And I finally get to put my new Uggs to good use. =)

Hooray for money in this crumbling economy.

AND GOSH DARN IT! Gas prices are going back up again! Get 'em while it's still somewhat cheap!

the alcocer anecdotes 09

2008-12-17T14:40:00.000-08:00

comfortable in this rainy weather? Need something to read? Get all snuggly wuggly in your jammies? Sure, why not.

Episode 9: Romanticism

m: so you're talking about the real kind of thing
d: yeah i guess
m: so. am i a romantic
d: i guess that was my original question
m: yes
m: i believe i am
d: no ur not
d: i can tell
m: oh, do tell
m: then what was the use of asking
d: it's hard to explain =[
m: -__-
d: i wanted to c wat u would say
m: -____-
d: and more importantly, how u said it
d: "i believe i am"
d: very lack luster
m: -________-
d: how do u view relationships
m: idk how to answer that question lol
m: there's so much to it
d: try, just start typing
m: no, you're gonna judge me lol
d: ???
d: judge u??
m: and say YES or NO you aren't a romantic
m: LOL
d: y does it matter if ur romantic or not
d: who said one was absolutely better than the other?
m: idk, now i feel self-conscious LOL
d: sigh vanilla
m: kekeke
d: i had a realization just now that you remind me of myself
d: like ur the girl version of me
m: you said that before lol
d: really???
m: yes lol
d: then it must be true
d: ur my sister
d: i knew it
m: AAAHAHAHA
d: one of us got switched
m: probably
d: in the hospital
m: like sister sister? lol
d: -.-
d: yes marissa
d: like sister sister
m: HAHA
d: ur crazy
m: that's what they say.
d: if i ever got stuck on AIM island and i had to pick an AIM buddy, it would be u
m: AIM island would be weird.
m: idk how that would exist
m: like the matrix?
m: if so, then AWESOME.
d: lol

~*~

And a quote worthy quotable:
d: I just want a mini marissa to put in my pocket so i could give her a little laugh every once in a while

HAH.

the tenth letter

2008-12-16T21:51:00.001-08:00

i have to tell you the truth, I can't believe it's been so long since I've read one of those heartfelt letters. I didn't really know what to expect. But after shedding a few years and laughing a few hearty cachinnation or guffaws (WHOA), I have to say, that was probably the best birthday present. THE best. I can't even begin to explain how it made me feel. Thank you so much.

Thank you to those who came out to my birthday dinner and those who wished me a happy birthday, whether it be from the many facebook comments I got or the quick texts at midnight. I appreciate it. I'm pretty darn lucky to have the lot of you in my life. I spent most of my night responding back individually to your facebook comments. I am a damn lucky girl.

A few specific shout-outs to:
Bailey and her new husband: I was ecstatic to hear you guys were coming. I wanted to hear all about the wedding. I'm happy that I got to sit next to you and catch up because we honestly haven't really done that. Well, maybe when we ate pizza in Karl's car that one night we went to see TMTMP play at the teen center. But you're so grown up now, and I'm glad that you're happy. Thank you for the ... surprising ... present. LOL. I honestly will put it to good use. It will be my guide. Maybe for my 21st, you could get me the actual thing so I could practice and play. LOL.

Bowie: Ooh la la, thank you for all those Victoria's Secret necessities. Karl likes them...a latte.

Karl: I think everything about yesterday was pretty special. Everything between us. I'm so glad to have you as a boyfriend. I think we can withstand anything together. =) Your present was simple and non-materialistic, and I think that why it meant so much more to me. I love you more than words could say...

Jasmine: Thank you for the present! I told Karl I was going to use it to buy Britney Spears' new album and he gave me the "-___-" look. LOL. Yeah, I'll put it to better use. =)

My birthday dinner attendees: I appreciate every single one of your presences. You made my birthday that much more memorable.

Next year will be the big one...or should I say, the big TWO-one...

Until then, thank you everyone. Awesome birthday overall.

it's ugg season

2008-12-10T11:18:00.000-08:00

and I am in dire need of a pair. My old pair has been eroded to the point where when it does rain, I actually slip around (and at times, slip to my ultimate demise, where I fall straight on my bottom). It truly is a compelling sight to see for yourself. I've never worn them since. I'd like a legit pair that won't wear out on me; one that will "stick" with me through the toughest seasons of rain or snow...or just for show. Yeah, a Classic Tall in chocolate or sand would be preferable. I wouldn't mind a Classic Short either. So if Santa is reading this right now, I've been a good girl. Thanks Santa baby.

So the Christmas season is upon us and I have one thing to say: Praise the heavens for awesome gas prices! I think that's probably one of the best, not to mention early, Christmas presents a college student could possibly wish for. Keep going down! Let's go down to the double digits! I will yearn for the days that they will be a quarter (could you imagine gas being a nickel a gallon like the old days?!) or so at most.

As for Christmas shopping, the economy certainly has made us a tad bit on the loco side. Man trampled to death on Black Friday?! That's amazing and just darn right stupid. What have we to show if we trample people to death or go on mad shootings at Wal-Marts? It's as if you'd rather get arrested and spend a good chunk of your life in prison than spend time with your family on Christmas with some dinky, yet heartfelt gifts. Isn't it the time to just relax and spend time with those you love? Isn't it the season of laughter, love, and caring? Isn't it?! I mean, we just had Thanksgiving. And I won't even begin to elaborate that day of thanks to you. C'mon people, get your act together. If you want gifts at a low price that bad at that store, get a freaking job there so you could get things with a discount and get them before the big Christmas rush. Damn procrastinators.

With the upcoming Christmas season is the upcoming Finals Week. Hooray. Busting out the books that we haven't touched since we first bought them at the beginning of the quarter; doing online homework that could have been done on those weekends you were vegging out; cramming all information the past few weeks have put upon you when you weren't exactly listening because you were staring at the person in front of you playing a game on his laptop; going crazy due to the fact that you realize something was actually due a few days ago...ah, Finals Week, how we all not covet your presence.

Now my favorite part, ladies and gentlemen. Christmas season, Finals Week, and an additional bonus of a gift: my birth. =) In a few days, I will have conquered my teenage years and move on to bigger and better (and older) things. Sha right. I'm still going to be here...sigh. Just a year older. I need to make some drastic change to my life. Like dye my hair pink or get a tattoo. I am going to get a haircut over break, so that'll be something. Maybe I'll get another piercing, I've always wanted one. Yeah, that will be the ticket. But farewell teenage years, hello twenties...and then the big two-one. But then again, what's the fun in that?! Doing things legally and what not...=)

thank the academy

2008-11-25T20:59:00.000-08:00

well, not really, but Thanksgiving is approaching. And for this momentous occasion, I would like to acknowledge those who have impacted my life, whether they may be for colossal deeds or perfectly minuscule nonsense pish posh. To tell you the truth, this is going to sound like a speech said at an award ceremony. So bare with me...

Thank you to my parents, who were perfectly and incandescently in love with each other to make me. Thanks for the continuous amount of money you guys keep spending on my education because I know you have faith in me. It's actually pretty wonderful knowing that you will always be there for me, no matter what the cause. Thank you for believing in me when not many people would. I'm going to say it now, I'm not the most perfect person in the world, but with your guidance and love, I'm pretty sure I can be up there, somewhere. Your corny jokes or your love-filled hugs will keep me strong and sane.Thank you to my friends. There are so many to name, I can't even begin to explain how much you guys have put a new perspective on life. Every moment spent with each of you are unique and perfect in their own special way. I learn something new every time I hang out with one of you. Just recently, someone opened my eyes and told me never to be afraid, to stop searching for approval. He's right. I shouldn't be afraid. I shouldn't fear something I believe so much in. To the friends I haven't truly met or have gotten to know as long as I wanted, I think you guys are probably even closer to me than some of my other friends. You have taught me to think outside of the box and put my brain to good use. I cherish you no less. I don't really care if you're one of my best friends or if we've drifted apart in some way, just know that I still remember. I remember all the things you do for me, paquito or grande. I have the pictures to prove how much you guys have made me one of the happiest girls around. So thank you. To the gazillionth power.

Bowie, you deserve your own special shout-out because not only have you been there through my incessant annoyance of a social life, but I know I can count on you to bring a smile and laughter to each day I breathe. I exist because of you, as mind-boggling as that is to comprehend. I love the comments you make about the most random of things and how you're always willing to quench my thirst every Tuesday morning. I don't care if I have to paint your nails (or even your toenails) every day; any time spent with you brings a beam of light to my heart. Know that. =)

To that special boy in my life, I probably have laid out how much I love you so many times. But I honestly DGAF. Now you, my friend, have taught me more than I could possibly imagine about life, about me even. You've taught me so many things, but above all: to live and love. My life wasn't as great before I met you, but now that I have, it's an amazing feeling. You held my hand during the most difficult of times and exposed me to new experiences by taking me places I've never been before. You showed me how to love, which is something that not many people in the world get to experience for themselves. I can't imagine what I would do without you. I'd probably be sleeping all day with all that free time. But you always seem to keep me up by allowing me to think about stuff, as weird as that sounds. Let's just say you broaden my mind. I thank you for all of that and much more.

Thank you to my little brother, I know I haven't really said this enough, but I love you. It's weird, now that I think about it. In the beginning, I seriously would give you a hard time because, I'm just going to put it out there, you were the youngest. You got to be spoiled with gifts and you received most of the attention. But now, older and wiser (I hope), I don't really care about that stuff. I wished for a little sibling and I got one. And now he's some kind of super stud who towers over me with his obnoxious height and deep voice. It's amazing how far you've come in life. So thanks for the laughter you've brought to my life because sometimes I admire your mind. You come up with the craziest, yet completely understandable, ideas in the world. I love your sense of humor. It keeps me alive...even if you are still a dweeb in my book.

password mania

2008-11-24T12:36:00.000-08:00

okay, so I just listed out usernames and passwords that I use on a daily basis. I don't know how it came to this or what the hell I was thinking, but from what I've written down, I have at least 14 different passwords, none alike. There could be more that I'm forgetting, who knows. I really don't comprehend how I could have remembered every single one of these (actually, at times, I have and had to reset them).

ZOMG.

I just scanned through one of my three email accounts and found a whole mess more. That's a grand total of 19 so far. Curse me and my many password retrievals. I get that I don't want anyone to hack into my accounts, but MAN OH MAN. Seriously, Marissa?

Alright, so I tallied up all of my "known" passwords and it came out to a shocking 24. How do I have the capacity to memorize all these? Oh right, I don't. That's why I have to keep retrieving all of my forgotten usernames or passwords and have them be emailed to me just so I could forget them again.

I'm sorry, but I just had to express how amazing it is that I have such a large number of passwords. There are probably some I'm forgetting still.

BUT TWENTY FOUR?!

the alcocer anecdotes 08

2008-11-18T00:27:00.000-08:00

i crave the mind that sprouts out cleverness and witt. Or maybe just Alcocer's would do...I suppose.

Episode 8: Fruit Basket

d: rawr
m: i say that
m: what's up dawg
d: no i say that
d: u stole it from me
m: LIES
d: =/
d: the truth is
d: i missed talking to u
m: hah this is true on my part as well
d: yay aww :)
d: u have touched my heart
d: in ways, no other women could
d: and for that, i am in your debt
m: SCORE
m: what are my options
d: wat u mean options
d: u have no options
m: whaaa
d: u should just be happy!
m: you said you are in my debt
d: oh
d: that part
d: yeah wat do you want @_@;
m: can I have a disneyland annual pass
d: how dare u take my love and turn it into money!!!!
m: LOL
d: i was thinking more along the lines of me just thinking good thoughts for u
d: or...a fruit basket
d: @_@;
m: mm i like fruits
d: exactly
m: will you hand pick them
d: can i hand pick them from farmer's market?
m: mmm
m: from ur garden
d: i don't have a garden unfortunately
d: :(
m: you have a secret garden
m: in your head
d: i do!??!
d: o
m: from which you give me wisdom
d: u want me to pick u metaphorical fruit?
m: precisely.
d: ingenious.
m: i know, right

grinds my gears

2008-11-17T18:46:00.000-08:00

i don't really understand why people on the bus ask someone if anyone is sitting in a free spot next to them. I mean, do you see anyone there? No.

boy: Is anyone sitting here?
me: Yeah, my imaginary friend Takanchi. I'm sorry, he's very unsociable. Oh my gosh, watch out, you just stepped on his suitcase. Thanks a lot. Oh, now he's getting irritated. If you don't mind, could you please step aside, he's getting very uncomfortable with your presence. Yeah, just right there. Over there. No, further. A little bit more. In fact, just go to the back of the bus, that'd be great. Yeah, thanks.

melt-worthy/cheesy relationship via text message
me: =) you make me smile.
him: you do too. i wish you were here. =)
me: me too =) I feel incomplete when I'm not with you.
him: because...we complete each other. =)
-note the bountiful amount smiley faces

By the way, did anyone catch the end of this week's episode of The Hills? Justin, well done. That's how all boys should be. Paquito surprises and gifts.

ZOMG. I just thought of the coolest and cutest Christmas presents to give to everyone. It's going to be a hefty amount of money, but with my new job, hopefully it'll go through. Pfft, I'm only going to spend this kind of moolah on the ones closest to me. EEP! Ya'll should be thoroughly excited!

BTW, the countdown begins...
TWENTY-EIGHT DAYS until my 20th birthday...
The last days of Tales from a Trivial Teenager...
And the start of Tales from a Trivial Twenty-Something...

artsy fartsy

2008-11-12T18:58:00.000-08:00

during the interview, I thought I'd be more nervous. But it was actually pretty awesome. I look back on that interview and think to myself, I've actually changed in the past years. I've become more confident about myself, more determined. It's a great a feeling. I could skip in the meadows for days. My smiles were endless today. Although the first few hours, no, the minutes right before the actual thing were a bit nerve-wrecking due to a certain someone. -_- Let's just say it takes around 15 minutes to get to the store, and my friend drove 85-90 mph on the freeway, and we made it in 9 minutes. Not only that, We left at 1050am for an 1100am interview. Yeah, that's right. I walked right into the store at 1100 sharp. You could imagine my heart rate.

The store was prepping for the holidays; it all felt so cozy; I felt so at home. Thomas interviewed me on a green couch by the fitting rooms. I don't think I've talked so much in an interview before. But then again, I've only had about 2 of them before this one. We talked about plastic surgery, Albert Hammond, Jr., school, housewares, Robeks, and art in general. Why this store, he asked. I believe that I relate to the vibe of the company's culture and I get where you guys are coming from, expressing individuality and art. I don't just come for the clothes, I come for the overall experience walking through the doors, it's very eclectic. Yii. It was overall a great interview. He asked what department I saw myself working in: women's clothing, women's accessories, men's clothing & accessories, or housewares. He went over the logistics of it all, and I decided I'd fit in with making that one-on-one relationship with the customers by being on the register and taking care of the women's accessories. He went over my availability and said, "here is me making you an offer." And that was it, I nodded at my pay rate, and we shook hands. I finally have a job.

Orientation is next week...MEANING...I get to bring my car. Praise the Lord. Thank you God for employment and paychecks. And not to mention, one of the coolest jobs a girl like me could have. You rule.

I told you I'd be seeing you soon, 40% discounts. Come here, come to momma.

In other news, I think it best to start off a new occupation with an eyebrow wax. Jeez, the brows have not been forgiving. This weekend. Mos def. And maybe a haircut. Don't worry, it won't be extreme (ahem*Brandon*ahem).

the alcocer anecdotes 07

2008-11-11T21:52:00.000-08:00

to tell you the truth, I've only met this guy once, and yet it feels like I've known him for ages.

Episode 7: Hands, Him, BS Olympics, & Dedication

d: say something cool
d: bust a rhyme
m: UM
m: BUM
d: about your hand
m: oh hahaha
m: the delicate, sweet mocha tone of my fingers illuminates the gold glow of my nails that linger
d: that was beautiful =)
m: thank you, it was either that of "hands" and "pants"
d: my hands are in my pants
d: easy
d: just like ur mom
d: ziiiiiing
d: what up

-~-

m: eh, i'll just write my intro tomorrow
d: ur so bad
d: u remind me of a current me

-~-

d: how went ur glorious essay
m: oh.
m: well I wrote three pages...decided to take a 15 min nap at 4am, which turned into a 4 hour nap, woke up at 830 and finished a page an hour til 1130
d: :|
d: i'm so proud of u :(
d: it makes me cry :'(
m: well, its contents don't exactly win me the gold medal in the BS olympics
d: you will always be a winner in my eyes :)
m: sigh, that was tough.

-~-

m: you should watch dedication
m: it's a cute movie
d: cute
m: go watch it
m: NOW
d: oh i can't
m: why not
d: i'm talking to u
d: far more interesting
m: well go watch it, ok? ok.
d: nay
m: yay
d: nay
m: YAY
d: DAMNIT WOMAN I SAY NAY!
m: YAY
d: ouch :(
m: yiii, i capitalized AND 36-font that shit
d: -_-
d: u think ur so cool
m: am i not
d: well news flash
d: u sux
m: that's grammatically incorrect
d: damn ur good conversation dragging me away from my homework :(
m: i'm not stopping you
m: BUT you should consider watching dedication
d: go away
d: :|
m: GASP
m: FINE.
d: no don't
d: :(
d: nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Auto Response from m: This is me going away, Alcocer.
d: :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(:'( :'( :'(:'( :'( :'( :'( :'(:'(:'(:'(:'(:'(:'(:'(:'(:'(:'(:'(
d: no no no no no no no no

mop my heart

2008-11-10T20:00:00.000-08:00

he sweeps me off my feet.

k: Sweetie.
m: You never call me sweetie. I like that.
k: Well...
m: I want you to call me that more often.
k: Well, I don't want to be one of those guys that calls their girlfriend names like "sweetie" and "honey" and "hun" all the time...
m: ...
k: Whenever I say it, it only comes once in a while. That way, it means something, something more.
m: ...
k: Hah, I just totally blew your mind!
m: This is true.

=)

I'm a girl. Sometimes I'm catty, emotional, sassy, sophisticated, cute and sometimes too smart for my own good. I would enjoy classy things like diamond encrusted Tiffany's necklaces and fancy, romantic dates at dim lit restaurants.

BUT.

The most cherished moments I enjoy having are the moments I spend loving and laughing with him. I love the nights consisting of waiting for the pizza delivery boy to show up with our dinner; when we're just lying down on my bed, on our bellies, right next to each other; when he turns to hug me and look deep in my eyes while we're watching a war movie; when he puts me in wrestling moves that I can't get out of; when I giggle because he digs his fingers in my ticklish spots; when we argue about trivial subjects such as whether or not my car is 4-cylinder or 6; and when pecks on the cheeks are so jam-packed with love, it's heart-melting.

I live for these moments.

"I love you. And not, not in a friendly way, although I think we're great friends. And not in a misplaced affection, puppy-dog way, although I'm sure that's what you'll call it. I love you. Very, very simple, very truly. You are the-the epitome of everything I have ever looked for in another human being. And I know that you think of me as just a friend, and crossing that line is-is-is the furthest thing from an option you would ever consider. But I had to say it. I just, I can't take this anymore. I can't stand next to you without wanting to hold you. I can't-I can't look into your eyes without feeling that-that longing you only read about in trashy romance novels. I can't talk to you without wanting to express my love for everything you are. And I know this will probably queer our friendship - no pun intended - but I had to say it, 'cause I've never felt this way before, and I-I don't care. I like who I am because of it. And if bringing this to light means we can't hang out anymore, then that hurts me. But God, I just, I couldn't allow another day to go by without just getting it out there, regardless of the outcome, which by the look on your face is to be the inevitable shoot-down. And, you know, I'll accept that. But I know, I know that some part of you is hesitating for a moment, and if there's a moment of hesitation, then that means you feel something too. And all I ask, please, is that you just - you just not dismiss that, and try to dwell in it for just ten seconds. Alyssa, there isn't another soul on this fucking planet who has ever made me half the person I am when I'm with you, and I would risk this friendship for the chance to take it to the next plateau. Because it is there between you and me. You can't deny that. Even if, you know, even if we never talk again after tonight, please know that I am forever changed because of who you are and what you've meant to me, which - while I do appreciate it - I'd never need a painting of birds bought at a diner to remind me of. "

PS. I'm up for a second interview at a potential job this week; a potential job that excites me so much, I can't wait to start. Truly. 40% discount, you're MINE.

one for the books

2008-10-31T10:50:00.000-07:00

first of all, I would just like to say I've never gotten drunk to the point where I've thrown up. But last night was one day that will live in infamy. Hah, no, it was pretty much awesome for the most part. I didn't throw up but came close to it; I just felt like throwing up. It was so hard to sleep because I kept thinking about the aroma of alcohol within the vicinity and taste of watermelon Smirnoff lingering in my mouth. But other than that, the night was a success, even though it was planned like3 or 4 days in advance. ACES.

I'm not going to get into details of the night because there was just so much going on around me, different stories being told, games being played. But for the sake of college partying, I'll leave you with a few Halloween costumes (that I could somewhat remember):

- half devil, half angel
- Tropic Thunder's Kirk Lazarus
- the universe (BRILLIANT, I must say)
- the Rainbow Fish
- kamikaze
- Hiro Nakamura
- military girl
- along with her military boy
- a barbarian?
- girls dressed up in shower caps and towel dresses
- slutty sailor
- slutty cop
- slutty prisoner escapee
- slutty bee
- another slutty bee
- slutty private jet pilot
- slutty Strawberry Shortcake
- slutty ME (you'll see in pictures =/)
- boy dressed up as a girl
- Okay, I don't remember anymore.

Last night was excellent.

the alcocer anecdotes 06

2008-10-30T01:25:00.001-07:00

long time, no talk, good friend. It's been ages since I've had a solid intelligent conversation...pfft. Neh, just random.

Episode 6: The Woes of Spanking Kyle

d: :(
m: i'm sorry i feel asleep last night, i woke up at 430am to see your sad face
d: aw :)
m: tell me of your worries, hopes, woes...
d: just woes...because we haven't chatted in ages!
m: yes, it truly is a woeful thing
d: indeed
m: any anecdotes from alcocer?
d: uhm yeah but if i started telling u them, i wouldn't be able to stop
d: a lot happens in alcocer years, they are much more condensed than regular people years
d: 0.1 alcocer years = 1 regular person years
m: ooh, so many experiences
d: yes yes yes
m: have you milked a cow
d: no :(
m: ate a snail
d: ew gross
m: gone bungee jumping
d: i wish
m: climbed everest
d: some day
m: go to a strip club
d: never
m: bought deodorant
d: O_O okokok i had to go to a strip club once in mexico, but that was for pledging and it was gross!!!
d: we were there for like 10 minutes and bounced
m: -__-
d: get it, bounced LOL
m: -________-
d: kekeke yeah it's a gross tradition, we stopped doing it i think
m: good riddance
d: i've never seen so many ugly mexican women in my life
d: well, all like 3 of them
m: LMAO
d: lol, low budget strip club, what can i say, wasn't much to look at =/
d: and they made it REALLY dark cuz they knew haha
m: what, where they like pudgy or what lol
d: uhm no, just bad faces, definitely not hot.
m: butterfaces?
d: yeah hardcore except more like butter-everything
m: HAHAHA that's just horrible
d: u think it was horrible?! what about me.
m: SHIVERS. just now.
d: :( QUICK say something funny
d: no wait, say something profound
d: no wait, say something crazy
d: wait, say something happy
m: THE JUBILEE OF HAVING THE HONOR TO KNOW SUCH AN ALCOCER BRINGS CONTENT TO MY HEART.
d: lol cute ty =p
d: lol jubilee hahahahaha
m: i know, right? first word that came to mind.
d: lol one of a kind you are

LATER THAT DAY...
m: psst
d: hi
m: writer's block
d: oh noes, may i be of assistance
m: neh, i think I'm just procrastinating lol
d: bad girl :( ur a rebel!
m: yeh...that may be.
d: O_O i like ur style
d: u got sass, and spunk
d: any other s words
m: so is that like...sassunk
d: what about style
m: or...spass...
m: or spank.
d: spassyle?
d: spankyle?
d: spank kyle?
m: hmm i know many kyles
m: none of which i'd like to spank
d: what if they're being naughty
m: i will tell them to go fuck themselves.
d: would u rather them spank u
m: no, i'm self conscious about my ass, thanks.
d: so you'd rather spank them
d: in fact, you'd rather spank kyle
d: i win.
m: fine.

hiccups

2008-10-21T16:55:00.000-07:00

i'm a big fan of plaine and simple, nice stories. I was home a few weekends ago and I couldn't help but smile at this one story my mother told me: My aunt and uncle went to the Philippines a while ago to visit my grandfather (who, by the way, is a completely awesome fisherman for being someone in his 90s) and my other cousins/uncles/aunts. My grandmother died when I was super young so I don't really recall her as much as I would love to. But I heard she was amazing. Or should I say perfect. Moving onward though, my aunt and uncle decided to visit her grave and upon reaching it, realized that it was so dirty, weeds sprouting out in different directions, just completely unkempt. Here's what I hated most: when they said that all the other gravestones around her were clean and maintained. It hurt my feelings just knowing that no one was coming to visit her; I'd probably be visiting her frequently if I lived over there. So a man comes up to them at the cemetery and tells them that he is the one who keeps all of the other graves clean and up to standards. He offered to help out the grave's upkeep for 100 pesos (which is about $2.25) a month. A MONTH! So my uncle (this really hit the spot) gave him 2400 pesos. That's TWO years of maintenance. And that's not all...my uncle gives him another 500 pesos so that he could buy milk for his children. WTF?! Although monetary assistance might be a little materialistic in some terms, but this, my friends, was one of the greatest gifts of all. I'm pretty proud to have an uncle who doesn't mind shelling out bucks to help out. Pride.

Is it weird for me to enjoy Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders Making the Team 3? It's really interesting. The girls are so damn beautiful. There was this one episode where the training camp consisted of measuring their body fat. It wasn't a weighing scale but this huge tub of water where they had to sit in this chair underwater and exhale all the oxygen they could. These kids had 12-15% body fat. I probably have 60%. And they would totally bash these girls for having 24% body fat because "the uniforms are unforgiving." -____-

I finally turned in job applications at three different locations. C'mon, one of them has to want me, need me. =) Either of them would be totally awesome. Clothes, designer jeans, and sushi? I'm there.

I also recently bought an old school camera. The only problem is finding the film to go with it. Yes, film. Never heard of it? Oh, it goes way back in the day. Those damn spools are really difficult to search for. Sigh. Someone help me find some. I'll take my first picture with it of you. Hah.

I typed this while I had hiccups, mother fuckers. Out.

superman needed

2008-10-09T10:42:00.001-07:00

can you read my mind?
Do you know what it is that you do to me?
I don't know who you are, just a friend from another star.
Here I am like a kid out of school, holding hands with a god.
I'm a fool.
Will you look at me?
Quivering like a little girl, shivering.
You can see right through me.
Can you read my mind?
Can you picture the things I'm thinking of?
Wondering why you are all the wonderful things you are.
You can fly; you belong in the sky.
You and I could belong to each other.
If you need a friend, I'm the one to fly to.
If you need to be loved, here I am.
Read my mind.

-Lois Lane in Superman, 1978.

ps. Yeah, Christopher Reeve was pretty hot as Superman.

eco's imbroglio

2008-10-08T00:31:00.000-07:00

i'm sorry, but Eco's article on the myth of Superman that I had to read for my writing class just got me so utterly confused, I have no idea what he's trying to say. This one damn paragraph got me foaming at the mouth:

For Husserl, the "I" is free inasmuch as it is in the past. In effect, the past determines me and therefore also determines my future, but the future, in turn, "frees" the past. My temporality is my freedom and on my freedom depends my "Being-having-been" which determines me. But, in its continuous synthesis with the future, the content of my "Being-having-been" depends on the future. Now, if the "I" is free because it is already-determined together with the "I-that-should-be," there exists within this freedom (so encumbered by conditions, so burdened with what was and is hence irreversible) a "sorrowfulness" (Schmerzhaftigkeit) which is none other than "facticity." Each time I plan, I notice the tragic nature of the condition in which I find myself, without being able to avoid it. Nevertheless, I plan to oppose the tragic elements with the possibility of something positive, which is a change from that which is and which I put into effect as I direct myself toward the future. Plan, freedom and condition are articulated while I observe this connection of structures in my actions, according to a dimension of responsibility. This is what Husserl observes when he says that in this "directed" being of the "I" toward possible scopes in ideal "teleology" is established and that the future as possible "having" with respect to the original futurity in which I already always am is the universal prefiguration of the aim of life.

...

...........

WUH?

Anyways, Nancy and I have found it to be an 11:30pm ritual to have late night wii battles/tournaments. I'm usually the victor. BWAHAHA. It's kind of our Zumba workout. It makes up for the times we'd say we would head over to the ARC but turned out to be complete failures with flabs. Flabby failures is what we are. But no no no, not when it comes to the wii.

the hundreds

2008-10-06T13:35:00.001-07:00

greetings earthlings. It's the one hundredth tale from a trivial teenager!

To christen the occasion, I think a long, in-depth, meaningful entry is at hand. So if you're ready for some random moments and juxtapositions, I think you've found the right place.

I'd like to start off by sharing that living in an apartment with three of the most awesome girls I have ever met is something that I will cherish forever. I didn't think we would mesh so well, and not to sound cliche or anything, but it feels like I've seriously known these girls for quite some time. Our lack of food brings us closer because we actually have to decide where and what to eat. Yesterday marked the first real roommate dinner for all of us. Well, plus our "technical fifth roommate" Tom.

m: Let's join a sorority with Nancy winter quarter.
f: Can't we make our own sorority?
m: Ok, name it.
f: Quad-Delta?
m: Perfect.

You know in those 80's movies where teenagers wake up and miss the bus so they have to run to the next stop to actually catch the bus? My story is just like that one, straight out from those movies, except with more heavy breathing. There I was, hurrying out of the apartment, locking the door, scurrying to the bus stop when I see the bus leave the stop. Deciding whether to just skip class or run to the next bus stop a few feet away, I booked it choosing the latter option. Not only did I make it, I had to sort of stop running a few feet before the stop just so I could still look cool and be somewhat fashionably late. The heavy panting calmed down to a mere...not-so-heavy panting. Damn shuttles and their crazy stop times.

We will be welcoming a new member to our sorority house (Delta Delta Delta Delta) by the name of Porkchop. Now, I'm not quite certain if he's named after the dog in the cartoon show Doug, but he is cute nevertheless. He is a maltese yorkie and will be loved endlessly in the vicinities of our very hearts. So come visit him! Or us.

STOP SPENDING MONEY YOU DON'T HAVE, MARISSA. (This is just for my personal reference.)

In other news, Mr. Lancaster came to visit recently. He promised me a cool poster to put on my blank art-forsaken walls. My walls are his canvas. We went to a shopping center nearby, and upon seeing a large purse, he inquired:

b: Can I ask a question?
m: Sure.
b: What is the use of bags this large? To put their babies in?
m: Yes.

I'd like to take a moment to talk about myself. I know that may seem weird, but I haven't really talked about myself lately. I've shared my experiences and feelings, but nothing truly concrete. I just want to tell you all what I've realized about myself so far, not as confusing case files about myself, but as solid Marissa stuff. I've noticed I don't quite fit in sometimes. As strange as it sounds, I guess that's what makes me...well, me. I hate clubbing, I don't listen to certain music that most people do, I speak using words I learned studying for the SATs, my sense of humor is a little bit more...advanced? I love using quips. I fancy people who use quips in everyday language. I am not a slut. I don't see the use of dressing up like whores. Well...I guess if you were one, then that's a different story. I don't dress up looking like I'm asking for it. Simplicity overrules everything in the end. I have trouble learning certain things. I avoid any sort of confrontation. I hate those suckers. I have somewhat of a inferior complex. But honestly, I don't think it shows. I do what I want. I say what I want. I eat what I want. When I see something I like, it's hard for me to achieve it. However, when I see something I like when shopping, then I go for it in a flash. But sometimes I get picky about things. I get picky about what color to get, or what clothes to wear, or just what facial expression to use (hah). I hate the smell of acetone and yet I enjoy mixing up the color of my nails. I don't like asking for favors from people. I only accept favors that are within reason. I love music that makes me feel good and that make my heart race. This year is going to be a great year...academically. I'm gonna stick it to the man.

I'm in desperate need of an extremely comfy and soft body pillow...for those lonely nights you aren't here to hold me.

Okay, so usually I'm not a big Lifetime movies fan, BUT just recently, I watched A Piece of My Heart or Perfect Opposites (as some would call it). I wasn't expecting much, just the usual romantic mumbo jumbo that we all know and cherish. Plus, Martin Henderson looked like a quite charming young lad. The last time I cried over a movie was over August Rush, which still touches my heart. But this movie, dang it, tore down the dams of my tear ducts even if it was just for a little while. Everyone needs a good little weep every now and then. So here I am, watching this movie (I kind of missed the first few minutes of it but I'm guessing it didn't really show much, I got the gist of it though), and I made a few connections of my life through it. Especially one line that hit very close to home: "He adored me. It's what I needed at that time." I want to be adored. LOL. So if you ever get the chance, it's actually not that bad. Lifetime caught me in their little emotional movie vortex.

I think this is a big enough entry, oui? Til next time, I bid you adieu.

Sincerely,
the girl with the quizzical brow.

the sidekick stories 06

2008-09-26T10:45:00.000-07:00

the new school year has begun and the pictures come rolling out...

Pretty delicious. Pretty cute.

Some adolescents decided it would be a great idea to scratch out some of the letters and lines from this IKEA ad in the store.
They were right (especially the last word).

This is Risha's C3P0 keychain.

This is my Stormtrooper keychain.

Marielle and the indecencies of two-layered visors.

Lounging in my bedroom, thinking about the stressful days ahead.

Andy Warhol is awesome. It pretty much resonates when he can make something so simple look so cool.

Okay, this chick needs to go back to a time machine. I haven't seen this type of hairstyle firsthand before.

The Dark Knight, starring Julian Pabicon as the Joker.
"I was smiling inside the mask."

Hollywood Chihuahua, starring Marissa Vanilla as The Nerdy Dog.

I would like to introduce you to my bruise.
Yes, the one I got from slipping in the shower.
I named it Estupido.
Welcome to my new apartment!
This is the kitchen area, where we like to...toast bagels and...make fried rice.
This is the area to the right side of the apartment where Cynthia and Nancy live.
This is the living room, where we recently hooked up a large TV to watch on.
This is Frances' and my bathroom.
...and our awesome shower curtain...
...our toilet (keke)...hey, I wanted to give you guys the whole experience...
...and my room!
This is my comfy ass bed...
...and my 9-inch television as well as my workspace.

Well I hope you enjoyed the tour! Come and visit Frances, Nancy, Cynthia, and I (and our new maltese yorkie Porkchop, coming soon!)

slip n'slide

2008-09-18T01:40:00.000-07:00

usually it's pretty funny when you witness someone slip or just plain eat it. But it totally sucks major balls when you're actually the klutzy person.

Today, I slipped.

And sure, I could mean that in the most metaphorical sense you can possibly imagine. For example, I slipped and fell into unknown territory when the boy I had been seeing for a few weeks told me he loved me. Or, I slipped into the mode of thinking that eco-friendly notebooks and filler paper would save the world when I saw how disastrous normal notebooks and filler paper are. I mean, there could be plenty of ways to reinvent the phrase "I slipped." And honestly, for once, I wish I did have a metaphorical reason to say those two simplistic words. But I don't. It's purely literal.

Bona fide shit.
I'm talking about I totally just ate it.
Not to mention, it was in the tub.

I seriously am not lying when I was super close to have some sort of liquid come out of my tear ducts. But to tell you the truth, this isn't the first time I've slipped and fell in the shower. It's the second time, yes, I've paid my dues. But that first experience was years ago. Over the past few years, I told myself that it wouldn't hurt so much: I mean, how dangerous could a tub be?

Way dangerous. Everybody get dangerous, everybody get dangerous.

Ladies and gentlemen! Step right up! See the most accident-prone being on the face of the planet! Take a gander at her HUGE red bump on her hip! It will frighten young children, so be warned. This isn't for the faint of heart.

Marissa, you're lame.
Cry me a river.

they ask why

2008-09-16T22:06:00.000-07:00

and I say, "because he tells me:"

I miss you when you leave me.
I love how you bring me lunch at work.
I'm sorry I always fall asleep after we eat.
I get really tired.
I love how you let me sleep after we eat.
Sorry if I am a little grumpy.
But work makes me grumpy.
I owe you gas money and gas money.

I think the lone act of appreciating someone is truly a charismatic feature in a person. It's so simple, yet so rewarding.

If I could say what I wanna say, I'd say I wanna blow you away.
Be with you every night; am I squeezing you too tight?
If I could say what I wanna see, I wanna see you go down on one knee.
Marry me today; I guess I'm wishing my life away...
with these things I'll never say.

*Don't ask me why I look like a little kid.

the word fucked

2008-09-12T21:30:00.000-07:00

go look it up on urbandicionary.com. Out of those definitions, these are the ones that are hitting dangerously close to home:

- to be doomed to misery in the near future.
- doomed or destined for failure.
- utterly screwed.
- the state of having no future.
- to be in the worst possible situation at the most inappropriate time; usually spoken in accordance with the word "up" in a coarse manner.

As for dictionary.com, their terms are somewhat more...encouraging, to say the least?

- to bungle or botch; ruin.
- to act stupidly or carelessly; cause trouble; mess up.
- to act carelessly, foolishly, or incorrectly.

No, I take that back. Totally not encouraging. Rather, just another way to bring myself back to the reality that is my "fucked up" life and deal with it. Somehow. I think that website just has a much more scholarly way of spitting out the truth that is the word.

My heart rate has undeniably increased at such an alarming rate and the cause of this future cardiac arrest is the entire concoction of registration fees, late fees, parental reactions, chemistry classes, financial issues, my lack of motivation, my procrastination, and not to mention my own "what-the-fuck-are-you-doing-Marissa?!" antics. I'm turning 20 in 3 months, and yet I haven't grown up. This, unbeknownst to me until now, creates yet another conflict in my already UGH-life-stress-list. I have to figure out what to entitle my blog in 3 months, seeing as how I won't be a teenager anymore. What will I be referred to as? Tales from a Trivial Twenty-Something?! Mildly entertaining perhaps. (If you have any clever and quirky ideas, let me know.) Sigh, and the alliteration managed so well these past few months.

Why, oh why, does my life have to be so complicated? Someone kidnap me. Quick. Take me to a park. Take me to a swing set. And I want someone swinging next to me, telling me "everything's gonna be alright" over and over again.

Pronto.

case file 04

2008-09-10T22:15:00.000-07:00

i don't know what it is, but my motivation has been decreasing at an accelerating rate. I've just been so overwhelmed nowadays with things that have clouded my mind for the past few months. I'm learning new things about myself, these all-around case files, and they're just complicated puzzle pieces that I need to put together by the end of my lifetime.

My willingness to succeed has been gradually dwindling away to God knows where. It's a horrifying thought. Today, my entire viewpoint on academics completely changed. But here's the thing, I don't know if I'm actually motivated to spark a change in my life; to actually do something to make it better. Every time I say that I'm ready to pump it up, it just doesn't happen the way I imagined it. To tell you the truth, I'm still stuck in high-school-mode and that, my friends, is not doing anything to improve my life whatsoever. I hate knowing that tomorrow is another day that leads to my future and I loathe the fact that I have to do something about it to actually come out the way I want to. That's why life is so difficult nowadays.

I'm not sure if I need someone to push me to do better, or some catastrophic event to keep me grounded, but I just found out that my life is a catastrophe as is. It's catastrophic in the sense that it's both a blessing and a curse. Sure, I need a little oomph in my life, that little spectacular unexpected, spur-of-the-moment freedom to keep me balanced. But as of right now, the negative catastrophe is weighing in and its consequences will be the end of me...well, so I reckon.

Someone help me gain an incentive.
I need the motive to grasp what the world calls life...
...as well as my future.
(which I am COMPLETELY terrified of.)

notable quotables

2008-09-02T08:30:00.000-07:00

summer has been quite the time to come across some inspiring, powerful, not-so-inspiring, silly, witty, stupid quotes and I thought I'd share some with you that have made my summer a little bit more illustrious.

-Fuck that man. No one disrespects my girl. Find out where he stays and I'll egg his place.

-I hope someday, somebody wants to hold you for 20 minutes straight, and that's all they do. They don't pull away. They don't look at your face. They don't try to kiss you. All they do is wrap you up in their arms and hold on tight without an ounce of selfishness to it.

-I heard this road is haunted.
-Haunted by what?! Cows?

-Maybe I ate something moldy. Now I'm gonna get cancer.

-If I could make someone dead with my mind, it would be you.

-Here's my thought on what we should do with this whole Mason thing. Once a week, we get some of my brother's loser ass friends to go over to Mason's house, ring his doorbell, and when he answers, they're just gonna BANG! junk-punch him right up in his man-business, and then he's gonna keel over; while he's writing on the ground screaming "WHY!!!," they'll go "YOU know why!"

-This is called multi-tasking in the power-bitch world.

-Well, she was a hamster, and now she's a guinea pig.

-Did you know I'm protective of you?

-I can't just sit here and have coffee with you. I love you. I know the other night didn't mean for you what it did for me, but I don't regret it and I haven't stopped thinking about it since is happened, and not just because it was great, which it was. But because it was right, it was so right, Lor. And you may not see that right now, but I do. And if I have to wait until we're both 80 years old for you to see it, then I'll wait. I'm not going anywhere. This is it for me, you're it for me. And I can't pretend to feel less that I do. I'm sorry.

-I'd still sleep on a park bench with you.
-Name the bench.

-Yeah, I went to the zoo, and now I'm a koala bear.

-She used the phrase "total internal destruction." Although I'm proud, total internal destruction? That sounds bad-ass.

Go find out where these quotes are from, why doncha? Oh please don't, it will demonstrate your lack of life. However, if these quotes ring any bells from your superior knowledge, then I congratulate you and give you a high five because that shows your well-roundedness...if that makes any sense whatsoever.

AND AND AND...

Just a mini-Alcocer Anecdote slash notable quotable for you:
m: crap, i'm scared haha
d: of what?
m: my practical, lol
d: pish posh, why would you fear such a trivial event in the universe.
m: because this trivial event leads to a grade that will practically place me in my status in that universe.
d: the universe care about a grade you got that YOU don't even care about?
d: foux de fa fa.

the alcocer anecdotes 05

2008-08-30T23:16:00.000-07:00

is there a time when this guy is not entertaining? I think not.

Episode 4: Michelin Tires and Samurai Katanas

d: if I was about to die and you only had time to say three words to me, what would they be?
m: you were awesome. lol
d: lol i WAS? =(
m: well ur gonna die lol
d: aw man, how depressing, thanks a lot =/
m: YOU'RE the depressing one! what an awful question to ask
d: why am I depressing?!?! =[
d: ok i'll reverse this shit, I was JUST born, what three words do you say to me
m: nice chubby baby. lol
d: asfkl u suck, I'm not chubby =[
m: oh, well I was
d: fatty, lose some weight ^-^
m: my parents nicknamed me michelin
d: lol how cute, but ur not white <.<
m: but I had rolls, everywhere. on my arms, my legs
d: send pix imo, so i can laugh at ur existence, then blackmail you
d: i was very well-behaved supposedly
m: that's good, you WOULD -_-
d: YOU would =/
d: it makes sense tho, cuz it's all about balance
d: as i get older, i become more evil and badass
m: ah, the innocence fades...
d: pretty soon ur gonna see me walking the streets in a samurai outfit with a 5 foot blade katana
m: oooh those ARE badass
d: i will cut anyone who comes within 5 feet of me
d: do you want to be my trusty sidekick
d: you don't have to wear tights or anything
d: ...unless ur into that sorta thing
m: and what will I carry around?
d: a box of rats, and u will throw rats at people
d: how about a staff
m: oooh what about a wand
d: what the hell are you gonna do with a wand
d: speak in latin to people?
m: ur wand from ur wizarding/mage past
d: who said i had a wand?
d: i just threw fireballs at people, which may have just been fireworks i lit on fire
m: oh, I streotyped. fireballs are a diff story

6 degrees

2008-08-28T17:43:00.000-07:00

have you ever played 6 degrees of separation? Well, I have reason to say that I will soon be related to some celebrities. WOOT. Not one, but TWO celebrities. WOOT WOOT.

1. So there's my dad. My own flesh and blood. He's a dope guy. Cleans up pollution, saves the world. His company came up with carpool lanes. So yeah, he's a pretty awesome dude. He tells some of the corniest jokes, but that's why I love him. He also is in two bands and has gigs. What a rock star. Plays basketball. He really is Super Dad.

2. My dad's sister is a silly bean. She's like the funny aunt who loves to shop for designer stuff. She gives some bomb Christmas presents. Haha. She also laughs like there's no tomorrow. It's a good feeling, hearing her laugh. It brings a lot of joy to any situation.

3. One of her daughters is a complete artist. She started off painting crazy stuff (I really want her to paint me something). She has like a full-on wall-sized painting of herself. It's awesome. It's so artsy, and it sums up who she is. Then she started working at Nordstrom as a make-up artist. Not only that, she then started working for Versace. So yeah, she's as cool as it gets.

4. Her boyfriend of many years just proposed to her a few days ago. I met him and he really is a cool guy. A cool guy for a cool girl. They've been living together for like years now. Up north. Sigh, I want to live up north. Something different.

5. His first cousin, you may have heard of him, is Jesse James. THE Jesse James. Well, there's two Jesse James'. There's a western film star named Jesse James. (Brad Pitt did an entire movie about him.) And then there's host of Monster Garage Jesse James. He's covered in tattoo and is a complete hunk. Haha. Turns out, Monster Garage JJ is a "direct linear descendant of the famed outlaw." Rad.

6. Jesse James' wife is pretty famous as well. Her name is known as Sandra Bullock. She's the star of Miss Congeniality, she was in Speed, the Lake House was a cute movie--oh she's just completely fabulous. I pretty much grew up watching her movies, especially stuff like While You Were Sleeping. And I seriously think I learned to snort during laughter from her. She's a wise one, that Sandra. I wonder if they'll be at the wedding. Haha. Most likely, I reckon.

Soooo...I guess I'll be somewhat related to three celebs. Jesse James, Jesse James, and Sandra Bullock. What a cool thing. Sigh...and now I'm in charge of making up games for the bridal shower. What to do, what to do...

you are a god, mr. sparks

2008-08-16T01:41:00.000-07:00

nicholas Sparks, that is.

I came to the recent realization that it has been many moons ago since I've seen The Notebook or A Walk to Remember. So being the carefree person that I am, I decided to watch both of them. Right after each other. Now usually, this would be for some slumber party or some girly outing, but I'm not quite sure if it's healthy to have two sobfests all in one night within the time span of 4 hours. It's as if Mr. Sparks grabs this metaphorical bow and shoots an emotional arrow into my heart. I give him some serious major kudos to that literary romantic novelist. And although I may have tears in my eyes and will most likely have a semi-damp pillow to sleep on tonight, it just goes to show that these kind of things make me so feeble in my state. Speaking of which, I'm also not sure if it's healthy to picture all of these romantic spectacles and creating this perfect microcosm of how a relationship should be. I mean, sure, I want a star named after me. I want a temporary butterfly tattoo stamped on the back of my shoulder blade. I want to be taken on a boat ride into a lake full of swans. C'mon, what girl wouldn't?

Ugh, I can be such a girl sometimes.

Hello, my name is Vanilla, and I'm a hopeless romantic.

the sidekick stories 05

2008-08-10T22:06:00.000-07:00

chemistry isn't exactly my forte; photography from a cell phone, however, is another story. While summer school has been kicking me in the arse as of late, I'd like to take a quick moment to divulge in the recent photographs I have come across (okay, so I took them) of the days that make my life, well, mine. Shall we take a visual stroll? Let's hold hands.

First of all, I'd like to introduce you to one of my greatest friends, Risha. She's a bit of an academics-freak, but I suppose that why everyone loves her so damn much. (Psst, come here. It's actually because she's just a silly girl who makes silly comments who listens to silly music and makes me feel silly.)

This is Risha. She's trying to find her new apartment.

This is her new apartment building.
She was really sad when she found out she was living on the top floor.

ps.

I found my own building.

Risha has a tendency to park far from the speaker at a drive-thru.
So she has to lean out. And shout at the speaker.
At this particular occasion, the lady just flat out told her:
"Okay miss, you need to stop yelling."

This is the after effect of late-night studying and lack of coffee.
Or maybe just my superior driving skills.

She woke up though...
when we started to stalk this SUV...
full of hot, topless, white, surfer guys.

Speaking of things I notice while on the freeway...
look, an overturned car.

On a more humorous note,
this is the solution to my fasha's lack of a bluetooth
(due to the new handless phone set law)
and his excess velcro pieces.

The new Chick-fil-A is open.
What's that?
A bird? A plane?
NO!
It's a dancing cow holding a sign.

In other news, Robeks is trying something new.
Well, not really new.
But new to Robeks.
YOGURT!
WITH TOPPINGS!
Check out the new counter.

My brother came home from Google.
He googles everything.
That googler.

And finally...
this is the photo I show people
when they tell me I'm stupid.

I just think they mistake my awesomeness for the exact opposite. Oh well. Who gives a hoot. Alcocer wanted me to really buy it.

on a swing

2008-08-02T21:44:00.000-07:00

life is absolutely at its peak when you're on one, no matter what your age, your situation, or your gender.

Lately, my family has been heading over to the park and taking a nice night stroll after dinner. I haven't been to the park in a while, but just being there overwhelmed me with a sense of tranquility and serenity. I used to go to the park a lot when I was a kid, whether it be for birthday parties or just to satisfy the urge to go on a slide. But reality started and I was thrust into life as we know it--chaos, confusion, work--before I knew it, I wasn't a kid anymore.

I stepped onto the playground at the park a few days ago and I just breathed the whole sight in. It was night time so there weren't many people there. And it's quite sad really, to know that there aren't a lot of people who enjoy the park anymore. Everybody is usually so caught up in the real world. But what I realized is that the playground, or the park, actually is reality. It's the reality that we turned our backs on at so young an age. It's the innocence we left behind.

Strolling over to the swing set, I wasn't expecting much. But once I got on and started moving, everything, the world as I knew it, changed. It somehow made everything better. Facing the trees rather than the playground itself, I found that the sky was a beautiful array of colors. The orange street lights were surrounded by a pink glow, and that pink glow was followed by a lavender that calmed the senses. After the lavender, a deep violet that cascaded the sky, and then a navy blue that summed up the entirety of the night. To top it off, stars sprinkled the sky in little increments for aesthetics. Every single time I swung forward, that scene put my mind, and my life, at ease. The late night breeze engulfed my entire body as I swung to and fro like a pendulum; my hair blowing in the wind. It was easy to forget the pains and fatigue of the world.

Plus, I would love to be kissed on a swing. Now that would be perfect. =)

So thank you, park-restorer or maker.
I applaud you.
Thanks for snapping me back to reality.
The one I used to know.

a case of the mondays

2008-07-28T19:00:00.000-07:00

ugh, I can already tell this week is going to be a total drag. Okay, maybe not the entire week, but the first half. It'll all be fine on Wednesday after 1 in the afternoon. So far, biology in the summer has been nothing short of a way too intense rollercoaster ride. Sitting in that lecture hall for 2 hours straight can drive a girl mad. Well, two girls and three boys. And maybe the rest of the 350 college students about to slam their heads against the desks and scream 'til their hearts' desire. I'll be relieving myself by going to Chick's Sporting Goods and purchasing the fashionable statement that Reg Thrillaveza wore at that one party a few days ago. You pulled it off good, homeskillet. I wonder how many I should get.

As for the employment aspect of my life, in general, I have a job and maybe, just maybe, I can get one more. So I'm waiting until that one phone call comes asking to express my views on why I would like to be a part of your company, what kind of things with benefit me if I worked there, what my flaws are, and what would make me such a great employee. Ah, the usual. But whatever, a job's a job. Tomato, tomato. Oh wait, that didn't really work if you were reading this. Say it out loud.

It's pretty awesome how a single phone call and just hearing someone's voice can brighten up one's day. Children's laughter and their innocence and their silly questions.

Jonah: Tell Tita Marissa I'm sweaty.
Karl: You tell her.
J: I'm so sweaty, Tita Marissa.
M: Haha, go take a bath.
J: Why?
M: Because you're sweaty!
J: But it's dark outside!

Joshua: Gobble, gobble, gobble!

M&K: Sing Caillou, Jonah.
Jonah: Caillou! That's me! That's me! That's me!

Joshua: Tita Marissa, who's at your house right now?
Me: My family.
J: Can I talk to your family?
M: You want to talk to my family?
J: Yeah.
M: Why?
J: Because I love them.

My heart nearly melted when he said that. Sigh, those boys. I really do love them, because they alone are so full of love themselves.

Our musical project finally has a name. It was between Promising Actress and Up and Coming Monarchs. We flipped a coin. PA = heads. UACM = tails. FLIP! The suspense is heightened...plus, Dave Trautz said he was down to come and work with us. The more talent, the more awesome this project will be. Now...where are those lyrics, Marissa? What's in your soul?

I can finally blast my iPod in my car with the assistance of my brand spankin' new adapter. It's about time. Now I can be one of those obnoxious people who turn up to max volume, windows down, sunglasses-clad, bump their bass, and lean like there's no tomorrow. =/ Maybe not, but I can be happy in my own little Acura world with my beige interior. Windows up, please. I don't feel like sharing my musical happiness with the rest of the world. I'd only do that with...

Oh, and it was tails.

dig dig dig

2008-07-26T10:40:00.000-07:00

before class on Friday, I sat down, watching television, eating my blueberry bagel, and tried surfing through the guide to see if anything interesting came up. And sure enough, the Disney movie that I had not seen in ages shows up. Here I am, excited as hell, glad that it just started. I was pretty bummed that I had to leave right when Pocahontas and John Smith meet and fall in love, but within those few minutes of watching Governor Ratcliffe order people around to keep digging the natural wonders of what was Pocahontas' homeland, I learned something about myself that I hadn't quite picked up on before.

I myself dig myself in rather large holes.

I don't mean to. Well, I do it unintentionally. I think it's because of my very complicated emotions and how whatever I say somehow brings chaos and pandemonium. Curse my complex emotions. Expressing myself in positive terms is always pretty easy for me, but the problem is, so is expressing the pessimism inside my soul. Does that make sense? Another thing I've noticed is that I'm pretty darn selfish. I only think about myself in most situations and not the other people around me who may get hurt. And I truly am sorry for all of that. Again, I'm digging myself in a really big hole.

I think it's about time for:

A QUOTE THAT TOTALLY BOGGLED MARISSA'S STATE OF MIND

L: I thought our story was epic. Y'know, you and me.
V: Epic, how?
L: Spending years on continents, lives ruined and bloodshed, epic. But summer's almost here. And we won't see each other at all. Then you'll leave town, then...it's over.
V: Come on. Ruined lives, bloodshed? You really think a relationship should be that hard?
L: No one writes songs about the ones that come easy.

In other news, in attempting to do the daily sudoku puzzles in the newspaper everyday, I came across the Horoscopes portion and realized that they hit amazingly close to home. Take Friday's horoscope for example:

Something old and worn can still be salvaged. If anyone can do it, you can.

A few days ago, my mother wanted to go to her sister's house to go and grab some of their old clothes, y'know, just to wear around the house. The entire family got dragged along as well (seeing as how I was appointed to drive for that one hour travel) and I'm really happy that I got to. Not only did my aunt bring out some of her old clothes, but also busted out some way awesome purses and bags! So now I'm about 9 purses richer, and they look so vintage, I love it!

Today's horoscope actually came at a very good time in my life, especially after yesterday's emotional fiasco:

Obstacles are created out of poor judgment. Realizing this, you bring your shrewd attention to everything you do. Your accurate assessment of the way things are will bring good luck.

This goes corresponds to the very beginning of this entry. I really need to stop over-analyzing things of such great simplicity. I would be fed up with myself already. Some characteristics of myself are beginning to be large problems and flaws about myself that I wish to correct. It's best for me just to rethink everything right about now...let's hope it works and that I become a better person in the process.

jam-packed jelly (ss04/aa04)

2008-07-21T22:21:00.000-07:00

extra! Extra! Read all about it! I've decided to create a compilation of some infamous blogs of mine in order to sum up the past few days of the life of this trivial teen, all smushed together like a peanut butter and jelly sandwich (which I would totally go for right about now). However, due to time constraints, each portion will be somewhat shorter than these normal infamous said blogs. So for your viewing pleasure...

the Sidekick Stories 04
How come the School of Engineering has such an awesome display?!

Karl, take note of this. I want these. I want green roses, with a touch of yellow. Do you want me to shower you with my love? Get these for me because I saw them, and fell in love.

I saw the cutest couple walking back from class. Tall ass guy, tiny little girl.

Yeah, I want a white polo. And a black one. My birthday is in approximately 5 months. Thank you for asking.

The last movie poster is titled: Bangkok Dangerous. Enough said.

This was the reason why Risha and I were a few minutes late to class: a burnt down Lambo on the freeway.

the Alcocer Anecdotes 04

alcocer's away message: llirg
me: living large in real ghetto
me: let limes imagine roasted goat
me: lifting large intimate rocky ghouls
me: lurking lands inside rusted garages
me: lumpy laundry irritates rugged guys
me: let lorraine imitate ryan gustavo
me: luscious lips identify red gills
da: ur a silly girl
da: it's just grill spelled backwards
da: u think too hard =]

And for your viewing pleasure...
Cinematic Strictures

Better Off Dead
This is, by far, one of my favorite movies from the 80's of all-time. Incessant newspaper boys asking for late monetary dues of 2 dollars. A heavyset social outcast weighing in on the price to woo the French foreign exchange student, as well as being pushed by his mother to make a damn move. The supercilious popular guy who is not a superstar at basketball (shocker!) nor football (what the?!) nor soccer (oh my!) nor baseball (you've got to be kidding me!) nor swimming (tell us already!), but rather is a skiing god. Then there's the in-between dude. I say in-between meaning he's not a complete dorkwad, nor is he the best of friends with Mr. Supercilious. He did, however, come close to it. Mr. Supercilious is now dating the love of his life, his ex-girlfriend. Of course, it's the stereotypical fact that she'd go for someone like Ski-Man, the heart of young Sir In-Between has been crushed and is now looking into ways to end his life from heartbreak and sorrow. It doesn't get any better than that. Plus, Momma's Boy's mother explodes.

V for Vendetta
I've always wanted to watch this movie. And the time finally came. I'm only sad this movie couldn't have been made before my junior research paper. It would have been such an awesome movie to put alongside Equilibrium and the book Fahrenheit 451. Damn, my research paper would have been the epitome of "da bomb." It was along the lines of Boringsville in the beginning, but pretty darn snazzy onward. It was a trippy movie that held such an exuberance of themes and plot twists. I don't even really know how to explain it. Natalie Portman gives an outstanding performance (not to mention she's still hot with her head shaved) as Evey, part damsel in distress, part freedom-fighter. Nothing short of amazing.

dear donahue

2008-07-17T20:46:00.000-07:00

i would like to take this moment to applaud you.

For two things.

1) Getting us lost, going all the way to Long Beach, almost to LAX.

2) Almost smashing into a BMW, having trash thrown at us, followed by being flicked off. Thrice.

aldridge girls

2008-07-10T16:03:00.000-07:00

forget Gilmore Girls, it's all about the soon-to-be Aldridge Girls now, baby. That is, Jamie Lynn Spears and her new kid, Maddie Briann.

I'm sorry, I just have to get this out. Jamie Lynn is now, officially, a bonafide milf. I admit, it'd be really cool to have a mom who was just a mere 16 years older than you like in Gilmore Girls. That way, you'd have more in common and rules would be stretched out just for you. Let's hope Jamie Lynn and her kid are the best of friends because sweetheart, you won't have any (nor a social life) with that bundle of joy you got there. Here is a little something I was reading that I thought was rather silly:

"We get up in the morning, and she gets her little bath. Then I get my bath. We have a routine, and I love routines. I've worked one out with her, and we're happy going about our little life."

Does anyone else think it's weird that Jamie said that she "gets her bath"? I picture Brit's little sis bathing her newborn, then Lynne Spears coming in to bathe Jamie Lynn, rubber duckies and all.

And a wedding for the sixteen year old? I can't even imagine. There's just so many things wrong with that. What would they serve at the reception -- chicken nuggets and juice boxes? And if the bride is sixteen are the flower girls zygotes?

Oh, the 21st century. Poor child, she has so many years ahead of her. I mean...she had so many years ahead of her. I think it was just a scandal, maybe a way to outdo her older sis. Yeah, Britney had it all: beauty, sex appeal, great hair, killer abs...two failed marriages under her belt, two kids who might grow up to be just like their father (God bless those poor children's souls), a former shaved head, a beer belly, a diminishing paycheck that she probably uses to purchase an excessive amount of cigarettes (who would blame the girl? She needs a major stress-reliever if you ask me), an old, ugly ass boyfriend; I'm telling you, she has it all.

Jamie Lynn: you have shed new light to the term "girl power." Alright kid, you're on your own.

Lynne Spears: WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO YOUR CHILDREN?! You should be ashamed of yourself.

the alcocer anecdotes 03

2008-07-06T21:10:00.000-07:00

dang, this kid.

Episode 3: Wizard to Mage

d: ur a silly goose
d: why r u so smart
d: it bothers me
m: why does that bother you
m: being precocious is pretty awesome.
d: ok it doesn't bother me, but i'm shocked because it is a rarity
m: i'll take that as a compliment =)
d: oh yes it is quite a compliment, espec from me ^.^
d: i must finish this image at once, u criticized the fan so i'll fix it
m: silly boy, pick a better picture lol
m: one where i could actually be imagined as if i was really being fanned and being fed grapes
d: UHHHHHHHHH that takes time, this is easy
d: and that picture is priceless
m: LMAO
d: when i think of u, i see that image in my head
m: well.
m: well then.
d: good luck getting rid of that association
m: wonderful.
d: MARISSA = GRAPES AND FANS and sad face
m: yeahhhh that's not right, i should be happy
m: i should be happy with all this
d: hmm
m: i should be treated as a queen
d: ok then send me a pic of u lying down on a couch or something
d: i don't feel like stalking ur facebook haha
m: sigh, i don't think i have one lol
d: well, then now ur just a heartless bitch being fed grapes and fan'd
m: i suppose that is the case.

It was then that I found a picture.

d: ok i'm working my magic

m: do it, half-wizard.
d: eww, get it straight
d: i'm a mage now O_o
m: oh wow
m: upgraded
d: god why do i talk like such a nerd with u
d: when did this happen??
d: fuck
m: IDK!
d: can we start over? i'm daniel
m: but nerd daniel is fun lol
m: NO i want nerd daniel
d: fuuuck
d: there r only like 3 people who now i'm a nerd

...then he had to leave after a good half an hour...

d: my wrist hurts
d: :(
m: omg, that's great
m: i bow down to you, oh great photoshop master

driving lessons

2008-07-05T17:54:00.000-07:00

why didn't I watch Driving Lessons earlier? Such a good movie, in my opinion. Plus, you get to see Rupert Grint in a different light. I like, I like.

Another movie I came across recently was Georgia Rule.

Georgia: Oh, you cut your hair.
Lily: It was getting in the way of my drinking.

That movie was surprisingly intense, in a weird way.

"If you call me a name, if you throw something at me ever again, if I see you talking to Harlan, yelling at Harlan, having anything at all to do with Harlan, I will find all of your boyfriends and... Fuck. Them. Stupid."

Damn, girl. That's my kind of hero. LMAO. "I am going to pray for her."

20 minutes

2008-07-04T22:53:00.000-07:00

people from all around the city come together from their jobs, their chores, their other duties, for 20 minutes to watch lights in the sky. It's fascinating. The light show was as spectacular as the freedom I got when I got to leave and move away to college. Listening to Owen play soft, serene harmonies, just to get the Fourth of July mood started. Absolutely divine.

It will be my last summer in Walnut, if my calculations are correct. Next summer, my apartment lease will still be alive until September of 2009. You know what that means...damn, I need a transportation vehicle. Oh, and parties, of course. Hah. This summer will be the last summer that I'll have to deal with parents who want me home every second of the day, and having them nagging me to clean my room, and being told what to do. I can't say that I won't miss it, because I honestly will. But I guess it's my time to fly. So if you're around next summer, give me a holler. My door will be open for an entire year. Just bring me some food or something.

faggot closet

2008-06-30T22:14:00.000-07:00

me: do you have something like this?

him: oh...
him: why yes i do.

me: do you?? =)
him: in my faggot closet.

SIGH.

note to self

2008-06-30T07:38:00.000-07:00

it doesn't matter.

Because all you need is love.

Love is all you need.

the wishlist

2008-06-30T07:25:00.000-07:00

i want to be chased.

I don't want to be the person who keeps chasing.

I want to be known.

Known as the girl who made your heart smile for the first time.

I want to be adored.

Adored so that every other girl gets jealous of our love.

I want to be remembered.

Remembered as the one who gave everything.

I want to be loved.

Loved to the ends of the earth.

numbers game

2008-06-29T19:05:00.000-07:00

me: Hey dad, where is Smart & Final?
dad: It's beside Idiot & Midterm.
me: Thanks, dad.

So, I can finally say I accomplished something over the summer. I finished memorizing a piano piece from Pride & Prejudice. Corny? Yes. Magnificent? Yes. Playing it is so fun nevertheless. Boy, I've missed playing so much. I'm in the works of another one as well; it's getting there. Can I play it flawlessly? Of course not, but damn, my fingers playing on those piano keys are pretty smokin'.

My parents and I watched The Girl with Eight Limbs on the History Channel today. My eyes were seriously glued to the telly. I've read stories about it, seen pictures, but getting to know the true story firsthand was, let me tell you, amazing. If you ever scout this show while you're gliding through the guide on your tv, give it a holler.

My brother was trying to teach me how skate his Rip-Stick. Dear heavens, let's just let Marissa stick to skateboarding for now.

On a happier note, America's Best Dance Crew taping on Tuesday; Six Flags on Thursday; and Fourth of July Robeks picnic on Friday. Excited? Yes.

Let's play the numbers game, shall we?

Marissa's Life in a Numerical Nutshell

Number of Pride & Prejudice piano pieces learned: 1.5
Number of limbs Lakshmi had: 8
Number of limbs Lakshmi has now: 4
Number of attempts Ren had to teach me to skate his Rip-Stick: 12
Number of things to look forward to this week: 3

the alcocer anecdotes 02

2008-06-28T08:06:00.000-07:00

yet another intuitive chat with the one and only Alcocer...

Episode 2: Grapes and Oversized Fans

d: wtf turn on accept files -_-
m: oh haha dammit, i just switched to my phone, i turned off my comp already
d: well that's royally gay
m: oh how ironic, like you
d: isn't irony the unexpected?
m: yes
d: but it's well known that i'm gay
d: so it's actually quite fitting
d: and the only reason i'm saying this is because i'm assuming you can't save convos on phones, woot
m: actually, i can lol
d: *#$^&$%^!#
m: i can email them to whomever too haha
d: i need you to do me a favor
m: depends
d: on?
m: how extreme it is
d: oh, phew, it's not extreme
d: just throw your phone out the window, preferably into a pool
d: if not, just delete this conversation =]
m: oh! i'd love to actually, destroy my phone that is
m: i want a new one, but unfortunately, i have approx 8 more months with this baby
d: so you'll delete it?
m: why would i
d: i said i was gay.
m: if it's "well-known" lol
d: ur bustin my balls here
m: that sounds painful
d: it hurts, so would u stop
m: i wasn't aware of busting
d: u are now!
m: what does the action of "busting" mean exactly
d: literally or figuratively?
m: both
d: punching/steppin on.............being a pain in the ass?
d: those are my guesses
m: so...you aren't completely sure then, cuz they're just "guesses"
m: i could totally be like feeding you grapes and fanning you with oversized fans
d: so you're suggesting that there is a chance that busting means...pampering?
m: sure why not
d: "ur pampering my balls here"
d: interesting. and gross
d: instead, delete it so in 34 years when i want to run for office, you don't blackmail me with this conversation
d: although, maybe it will help with the gay vote.
m: and then you'll be responsible for the new slang "pampering of one's balls"
d: no actually
d: YOU would be responsible for it.
m: true. very true.
d: you would blackmail me JUST so you can get publicity, and credit for this phrase
d: effectively putting you on the wikipedia map
m: sweet.
d: why wait til then? let's make an entry for you right now!
m: oh! how fun hahaha
d: i'll do it later o=
d: -__-
d: i'll find a pic of someone being fed grapes and being fan'd with oversized fans
m: lmao urbandictionary.com
d: will u thumbs up it later?
m: fasho.
d: ugh finding this pic won't be easy
m: word.
d: i thought i was so smart looking up caesar
m: lmao
d: but all i can find is his death...and stupid chicken salad pictures ~_~
m: that's good
d: ?? no it's not!
m: what about "royal treatment"
d: nope, anymore bright ideas?
m: hmm, "the good life" lol
d: did u ever watch history of the world
d: LOL good life came close
m: no. that must've been a long documentary
m: oh yeah????
d: ha
m: what'd you get?
d: ha ha
d: -________-
d: a comic cartoon of caesar eating grapes
m: damn haha close for u too
d: yeah, there is a perfect scene from that movie, i'm trying to find it
m: search away
d: FUCK those bitches
d: i got the pic, but they black'd out everything but caesar
d: USELESS
m: lmao, they knew you were coming
d: i give up, i'm just getting a picture of u and putting grapes and fan next to you.
m: LMAO make it snazzy and legit haha
d: f that, i'm almost done.
m: haha great, this is gonna look retarded
d: duh?
d: done.

d: i'll make a pretty one later.
d: your face makes it
m: the fan isn't even clearly visible
d: that's the point
m: what's the point, praytell
d: don't ask me what the point is, but it is definitely pointed
d: !!!
d: uh
d: because
d: so
d: how about those lakers losing
d: pretty cool

profoundly listening

2008-06-28T06:33:00.000-07:00

recently, I have been word vomiting my way through life, providing insights to things that have troubled me in the past or have touched me as well as got me inquiring about the wonders of the world. I think it my turn to share these experiences of life and the wonderments of what we know as life to the world...through music. So, it brings me great and exciting pleasure to tell you, faithful readers, that I, in collaboration with a former member of The Ready Aim Fire! and Trinitron Meets the Mars People, am currently in the works of making/writing a song. I swear, the summer heat is bringing out the creative juices in people.

However, it's what I will be writing in lyrics that will probably be the most profound part of it all. Settling on just one main thing to talk about is going to be tough. I have a few ideas bouncing around at the top of my head, but I want something to be truly meaningful to get out, something that will touch someone, something that will pull at one's heartstrings, something that will make you pull your car aside while you're driving on the freeway (actually, that would be an unsafe thing to do)...just to listen. Okay, so I'm not quite sure it will be that extreme, but I hope it does reach out to someone, anyone. Once I do that, it'll be a thing that I could say I've done and not many people out there have done. So keep your eyes, mouths, and most especially ears open to the sights and sounds of, well, me. And the collaboration with __________. (Uhh, we need to fix that. PRONTO.)

Bitten by the music bug.

case file 03

2008-06-19T21:06:00.000-07:00

why is it that parents seem to enjoy making their children's lives as miserable as possible?

I have been everyone's good girl for way too long; way past my due date. I have followed every rule of the house. I have done my share of good grades. And yet somehow, some way, I have nothing in compensation. They don't give me anything. Nothing.

I can't hang out late with my friends and honestly, it just brings tears to my eyes not knowing or even comprehending why they torture me in ways inexplicable. I just don't understand! Why do they do this to me? Do they want me to be miserable? Unsociable, perhaps? They push me to talk to people at the most inappropriate of times and yet, I can't even hang out with my own friends?! Why, I ask, why? Sure, I get that they're concerned that I come back at like 1 in the morning or so, but hello? It's not like I do that every single fucking day. They should be glad I don't do drugs or I'm off having sex with every single guy I meet. They should be glad that I don't go out every single night. They taught me well enough and they should know that. But cut me some slack. Please. I'm back from my first year of college; my first year of true freedom; my first year of not living at home; my first real year of independence.

But I guess I should have known...that I'm back home again. With my parents. And their stupid rules.

she wants

2008-06-17T22:17:00.000-07:00

she wants someone to hold her at bedtime
She wants someone to push the hair from her eyes
She wants a surprise at every turn
She wants someone to wipe the tears from those eyes
She wants someone to love her without make-up
She wants someone to shower her with smiles
She wants to help him become a better person
She wants to be the only girl he sees in the room
She wants to be the object of one's affections
She wants to be the girl with fair reasoning
She wants him to put his arm around her
She wants him to look at her all starry-eyed
She wants him to look past her faults
She wants him to want to do something for her
She wants him to hold out his hand before hers
She wants a dedication of dreams
She wants him to go above and beyond
She wants him to ask her what's wrong
She just wants to be loved.

random revelations

2008-06-14T22:23:00.000-07:00

just thought I'd share some of my thoughts I have come across over the past few days:

- I will never get tired of watching Sleepless in Seattle.
- There are so many hoes in the world. Gah. I can't take it anymore. They all need to calm the fuck down or just stop. Mother of pearl.
- Foreigners Jonathan Rhys Meyers and Adam Garcia give me toothaches. Delicious bitches.
- My belly is getting chubbier. Bummer.
- A year and 4 months with my boo and I have never gotten tired of him and I never will. I love him so much.
- College Year One is over. O.O
- I have made more true friends in a few months than I have in a few years. I love how everyone is just so different.
- I need a job to get money to pay for gas to get to summer school in Irvine. That's a big chain reaction.
- This really isn't a revelation but go type "Justin Bieber" in Youtube. "With You" is the cutest in my opinion. What a cutie.
- God, thank you for creating someone like Ryan Reynolds. His backside looks just as good as his front side. And you know how much I love masculine backs.

- I feel so much cooler when I lose my voice. Like today for example, my parents had no idea what the hell I was saying because most of the syllables and words from what I was saying were completely incomprehensible. Brilliant. And plus, I just sound ten times more sexier. Especially my laugh. Or lack thereof.
- I would totally do Anjelah Johnson.
- Another non-revelation-Youtube-thing: "the first slut is the cheapest." Listen all the way to the end please. The last minute is the best.

the sidekick stories 03

2008-06-09T17:00:00.000-07:00

there comes a time in a woman's life when she must scour the world, or her nearby shopping malls, to purchase the one, the only, Rock Band.

Okay, so I just threw this in for kicks. The night Calmindon went awry.

The dope ass restroom sign intrigued me.

This basically diverted Alison and my attention, thus missing our ATM stop.

Life-size Elmo.

The craziest Star Wars figurine section I have ever seen.

It couldn't even fit in the camera screen. So I took two shots.

This is a silly display. It's funny how all the boxes are for the male anatomy.

This got me excited for the new Batman movie. Except, Batman isn't really made up of Legos.

The model Alison was staring at. Not because his hand was in his pants, of course.

There seems to be a cool fountain everywhere I go.

Self-explanatory.

Bam. Welcome to South Coast. That's the bridge we got hit on.

And this is where we received our hunger salvation.

cherished times

2008-06-07T20:43:00.001-07:00

just because he's worth every moment...

intoxication

2008-06-03T10:42:00.000-07:00

installs turned out to be one of the most dramatic events ever. All that planning, all that practice, all the stress of having to find a dress all came down to this one day. And what happened? It all came to a crashing halt. I won't go into details because I've seriously told the stories so many times to so many different people asking how it went and trust me, it's not a fun story to tell. Let's just say that no one got installed that night and I missed my own boyfriend's birthday because of it. Pictures to sum up the night goes as follows:

word sentence idea (aa01)

2008-06-02T03:05:00.000-07:00

it's always a rejuvenating feeling to have conversations that include fun, witty things. Read it all, if you can. It's pretty funny.

Episode 1: The English Literature

D: i heard ur the best dancer

m: WTF

m: FROM WHO

D): everyone

m: be a little more constructive on your feedback lol

mM): who is 'everyone'

m: nawww haha i just havent danced in a while

D: by everyone i of course mean every person currently in existence

D: and by that i mean jenn and arika

m: no wayy....even obama!

m: oh.

m: -___-

D: haha i was gonna say bush actually

D: how funny

D: i thot that would b lame to say tho

m: bush. -___-

m: do you watch alias?

D: nope

m: d'oh

D: i can call u alias tho

D: that would b the best alias ever

m: aaaaahahaha

m: no doubt.

D: i think ill name my child alias

D: and my second one alias number two, that will REALLY confused the hell out of people

m: but what if he/she becomes a secret agent

m: and they really need an alias

D: uhm

D: well then they can jus go by the name of bob

m: oooh tricky.

D: that is tricky

m: poor kid,

D: maybe ill reconsider the name alias

D: just call him/her shitface

D: that was fun game

D: super fun

m: twas*

D: t'was* actually

D: = )

m: -_________-

m: you say the word "ill" and not "i'll" lol

m: lack of punctuation, my friend lol

D: yeah but how often do you type twas in chat

m: a lot.

D: only smart people like us use it/know what it means

m: i also like using fortnight lol

D: LOL

D: what is that

D: 40 days or something

m: -___-

m: 2 weeks lol

D: oh yeah something like that~

D: well then u r super cool, golden star for u missy

m: hoorayyyy

D: actually, thats nerdy

D: half star only

m: damn.

m: so close.

D: u get the other half if u dance well

m: gah.

D: or if u have a funny joke

D: O_o

D: or u just make a clever/funny comment

m: mm.

m: my witty comments just flow whenever.

D: you remind me of a young me

m: i don

D: steady your path, for you are destined for greatness!

m: i don't have a penis.

D: yeah except the whole looking like a man

D: and penis thing

m: hahahaha

D: minor details

m: yeh, just minor.

D: the important details, however, are your mental skills!

m: miniscule things.

m: absolutely.

m: amen to that, brotha.

D: well my train of thought was "alias sounds like aeris, wait she wont know what aeris is, oh wait but what if she has played final fantasy 7, oh so just ask her, ok, ill ask her"

m: LMAO what a cool train of thought

m: and aeris IS a coool name

m: its like erin. but like. eris.

D: word

D: so i take it u havent played any ff games

m: sentence.

D: :*(

D: idea

m: phrase.

D: what the

D: u cant go from idea to phrase

m: oh. i thought we were just naming literature-ish things.

D: no there was a clear hierarchy here

D: word makes sentence

D: sentence makes idea

m: hmm, didn't see that one coming.

D: idea makes ______ (ur turn)

m: hmm...

m: this one is hard.

m: man.

m: why do i get the hard one.

m: that's what she said.

D: no the hard one is going to be after idea...

D: lol no

D: that's what YOU said

m: WELL I DONT WANT TO SAY ME lol

D: but you did = \

D: which means, u get the hard one

D: oh zing~!~!

m: GAH

D: u appear to have a high-quality taste/respect in/for comedy

D: r u asian

m: you asked me this before!

m: hahahaha

D: o

D: no that was a dream

D: i dont forget things

m: no T'WAS not a dream

D: double negative

D: twas a dream

m: AFFIRMATIVE

D: exactly

m: i was sitting right next to you.

D: actually u were at my left

D: but.

m: THATS NEXT lol

D: yeah but u said right

D: moving on

m: BAH

D: so

D: wat r u

m: what do you think i am

D: some latin american + asianness

m: ooooh impressive

D: or jus filipino

m: ooooh impressive

D: ok im over it

D: anyways

m: lmao

D: i jus rememberd

D: ur the person

D: who thinks

D: u like fotc more than i

m: i don't think.

m: i KNOW.

D: uh

D: correction

D: think

m: uh correction. KNOW.

D: i will lay the smack down if i have to

D: O_O

m: is that so

D: word

D: so

D: step off this.

m: i don't step off. i step UP like channing tatum.

m: i cower at the name of chemistry.

D: you fear the understanding of a subject

D: tis but a state of mind to learn something

m: i fear all that is chemistry.

D: ~_~

D: for shame

D: i call bogus

D: ur acting!

m: i shant lie to you. i would have been in the acting biz. but i refused. but chemistry still remains where it stands in my book: NUMERO UNO on THINGS TO COWER

D: is there a reasonable and logical argument for this, or is it but an old dreadful memory, a mere, association of emotional connection to the subject

m: i would most likely originate my fear from the "old dreadful memory, a mere, association of emotional connection to the subject."

D: care to elaborate

m: well.

m: it's simple really

m: chemistry = fail.

m: no.

m: chemistry = epic fail.

D: not enough context to make an adequate opinion i fear. however, i will just assume you had a few consecutive "bad" experiences with chemistry, and now you believe it is beyond you. which of course is just absurd

m: yes, yes, make that very assumption.

D: as long as we agree it is absurd ^_^

m: mm....

D: or shall we play with the rhetoric a bit...

D: ridiculous?

m: i must disagree. it is galaxies beyond.

D: asinine

D: sigh

D: u make me head hurt

D: :o" src="aolbart:/1024/id/2B00000281/3E3A6F" unselectable="on">

m: you make MY head hurt lol

D: aye, an eye for an eye

m: aye.

D: eye

m: i.

D: http://www.buytaert.net/cache/images-miscellaneous-2006-eye-500x500.jpg

m: uh

m: what a nice eye.

D: that's mine

m: wow, it is very hypnotizing.

D: that's how i get the women

D: = \

m: or should i say hypnotEYEzing

D: lol

m: bah

D: NICE

m: wow, italicized AND bolded...score for marissa

m: AND underlined*

D: dont forget underlined

D: word.

D: that is

D: the whole package

m: mos def

D: u have reached womanhood

D: u are now a woman

D: congratulations

m: YES. ive waited all my life to get out that whole britney 'not a girl, not yet a woman' stage

m: god, that took forever.

D: yeah

D: all it took was a display of ur masterful comedic skills

D: to a certified womanhood-er person no less

D: that would be me~

m: cue exhilirating motivational music

m: or the alleluia hymn.

D: lol

D: yeah

D: grats

the sidekick stories 02

2008-06-02T01:54:00.000-07:00

yeehaw! It's another round-up of the past few days!

France Ass and I walked straight into South Coast Pah-la-za.

And we walked straight out after 5 minutes seeing the types of stores here.

This door happens to be the cutest F21 dressing room door ever.
I'm not quite sure what this is, but I'm guessing it has to deal with the fascination I have of France Ass's legs when they are in motion.

Would you buy this Hannah Montana handbag? Yeah, I know you would.

Just because my boo's name is in it.

Then France Ass, Tango Man, and I headed here.

This is where we found this awesome fountain.

At the Spectrum, we met things that made us go 'aww.'

I wanted to grab this Scottish Terrier and hug its brains out.

They were climbing the glass walls to lick me. Poor babies. All confined.

Another F21 stop, trying to find a good dress for installs.

It looked vintage, but this one was a potential one as well.

And so was this one.

But I ended up with none of those, to tell you the truth. I found the cute dress I had my eyes on and it vexed me to purchase it. So I did. And I wore it to installs, where I took a picture of this lovely young pledge sister. She kind of reminds me of the thing at the end of Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull. I don't want to spoil it for people.

She decided to try again.

This is Takako.

And this is Melissa.

She's my rhyming name twin. NT. Go figure.

This is Grace. I thought she was going to take me home to Walnut because she's from DB.

It turned out she wasn't going back "home," but back to Irvine instead. But anyways, this is Jenn.

And this is Taco totally gone.

She has a nice throat. But she woke up. Sorta.

And so we all took a picture with an almost-knocked-out Taco.

Meet my new skateboard. I have yet to name it.

But I'm pretty excited to ride. Thanks Big!

Say hello to my strawberry H2O. It was mighty delicious.

Had dinner with Karl's family and Josh was being a camera whore.

This is the birthday boy keeping his sexy locks away from his sexy eyes with the assistance of my headband.

This is the newly named camera whore of the family.

Look at him, all model status and everything.

He has a lot of faces actually.

Aww, this is cutie pie Jonah. And Papa Osaki in the background.

Another Josh face.

Cutie pies forever.

"Jonah, you look scary. Don't do that."

Yet another face.

And another. He's seriously posing for all of these.

Hardcore boys.

I taught this kid how to make the Batmobile using a rubber band.

And then I tried teaching him how to make a star, but that turned out to be more difficult.

End.

the sidekick stories 01

2008-05-27T08:48:00.000-07:00

here's a summary of a few days in a few pictures.

Bowie at work. Every Tuesday and Thursday.

There is Bowie's dimple.

Ugh. Bowie's feet. Spot Alison!

My sleeping partner.

The awesome purple beach house.

My latest craving.

A meal at McDonald's in Mammoth with tasty iced coffee.

Outside, there was no snow.

That changed after a few minutes.

I started camera whoring in the snow.

Then my mom revealed her silly Cookie Monster socks.

My cousin spilled fruit salad on me.

But my other cousin thought it was nasty.

The snow on the car.

I'm not sure why I took a picture of this.

The icy road up to Mammoth Mountain.

I didn't get to snowboard, but it was more camera whoring for me.

Coach outlet. $30 contact lens case.

Cousin and I.

An aisle of stuffed animals.

This reminds me of Lamb Chop.

And this reminds me of Juliet.

The back window was blockaded with snow.

My home for those few days.

Our neighbors' cars.

Snow-covered trees.

The cute boy I saw at Target.

On our way out.

The snow-covered mountain I could have been boarding on.

Straight out of a Hallmark card.

Trees outside our window.

Gargantuan A1 steak sauce bottle at Karl's house.

Walking back to my dorm: which one doesn't belong?

thursday blues

2008-05-22T23:33:00.000-07:00

and to think the day couldn't get any worse.

I started off today with 2-3 hours of sleep. Now, I don't know about you guys, but most of the time, when I have some sort of deprivation of sleep, I'm in a pretty crappy state of mind the rest of the day. So that's how I woke up. I woke up to the sound of bustling college students, gathering together into the lecture hall, awaiting the curious anticipation of determining the use of chemistry formulas and balancing and equations. My chemistry midterm, folks, was not for the faint of heart. 26 multiple choice questions doesn't seem that bad over a time span of 75 minutes. But I would say a good 90% of the class was still in the lecture hall: squirming in their seats, trying to get every ounce of information they could squeeze out from their chemistry oceanic brains, using up every possible second they could from those 75 minutes. That was not a fun exam at all.

I dragged my feet back to my dorm after the whole Chemistry Massacre and my roommate and I compared answers. I was surprised to discover we had most of the same answers. That put a little weight off my shoulders from the gargantuan of a burden I had today. But it wasn't until my decision to do one load of laundry that this choice brought my day down once more. My purple sweater. My purple sweater totally fucked with my one load of laundry. Of all the days to be less cautious about what I put in a load of laundry, darks, lights, woolens, whatever, today just had to be the day that my purple sweater decided to spread some of its awesome purple dye onto my other articles of light clothing. My crystal clean white AVA shirt now is a light purple tye-dyed miracle. It's pretty cool, but I'd much prefer it to be radiant white. White like Johnny Depp's character Willy Wonka in the remake of the movie. That's how beautifully and blindingly white it was.

I thought things were going pretty well after that, after I had accepted the fates of some of my most precious light colored tees, now dipped in a vat of light purple dye. Sigh. I was getting so close to the end of the day...when I unknowingly dig myself into an even bigger hole. I text my PD (pledge dad) asking whether I have to pay for my date for installs or if he is accounted for in the $20 dinner fee. But I get a text back saying I can't even bring my own date, that my date either has to be a bro of the fraternity or go stag. Once my retinas hit this horrific sight of a text, I hid behind my pillow and started to cry. Really bad. I've been going through so much stress lately and it may be due to the fact of my pre-menstrual cramps (which all of you love to hear about), but it's my boyfriend's birthday. I mean, c'mon. That's just unfair. Unfair to me, unfair to us, but mostly unfair to him. It's like I can't go anywhere without hurting someone.

And I can't help thinking that today was just a day full of disasters. I don't know, maybe I just needed a stranger to show me the way, cast away my problems (and no, I will not answer my problems with alcohol -__-), to help me find the strength to pick myself back up again. I'll talk to God tonight. That sounds like a good plan.

"We'll figure out something..." -Thanks baby. I love you.

I topped off my night with telling the incessant screaming giddy girls outside of my dorm to please keep it down (not my first choice of words, if I might add) and a shut of the door. Cherry and whipped cream, my friends.

refusal to grow

2008-05-20T18:01:00.000-07:00

whenever I hear stories about college kids hitting up the party scene or drinking 'til their hearts desire, it gets me thinking. Why do teenagers like us want to grow up so quickly? Why must we have a certain percentage of alcohol in our bloodstream in order for us to have fun? Why do we need fake IDs to get into clubs? Why would you even want to go to a club anyway? The word "fun" has changed its meaning throughout the years and it hurts to know that people my age would rather engage in activities such as these instead of having "actual" fun.

"Let's go to the beach and have a bonfire." This is easy to say with the phrase: "and bring some alcohol." WHY?? Everything could be as much fun without the alcohol! It all depends on you! It depends on the people you bring! It doesn't depend on what type of alcohol your friend brought in the blue ice cooler over there. No! Make sand castles! Bury your friends in some sand! Go rent a beach cruiser and go biking around the plaza! Get some ice cream at the nearest parlor! Play some fucking beach volleyball for goodness sake! Anything! Minus the alcohol!

I don't understand what the problem with teenagers nowadays. Your teenage years are almost up and once you turn 21, I can bet you a lot of money that you're going to look back on these years and wonder why the hell you took them for granted.

People, c'mon. You're still young. Quit with your "I'm so young, I'm so cool" mumbo jumbo act. You're not the shit. Seriously. You're still a teen. A few years ago, you were a tween. Your breasts weren't fully developed. You had braces. Your acne was outrageously out of control. Your hair was disgustingly untamed.

Have some good clean fun. Go watch a movie with friends. Play laser tag and shoot those mother fluckers to another dimension. Order some pizza. Have a slumber party. Get your nails did. I don't know!

Why are you guys in such a hurry to grow up? It saddens me.

the insanity box

2008-05-16T10:18:00.000-07:00

alison and I are seriously about ready to tear off our ears and go nuts over our microfridge. It screams in the middle of the night, in the middle of the morning, in the middle of the freaking afternoon. And it seriously just won't shut up. I have no idea how we have stood it for so long, almost 'til the end of the school year. But goodness gracious, it's like listening to a melancholy man singing a melancholy tune because of his melancholy life and all you want to do is go over there and sock it him in the face. If you ever come and visit to witness this psychotic rectangular box, then be my guest to tell the company we rented it from to go and suck a dick. Alison and I are having hallucinations from deprivation of sleep. We sometimes wake up in the middle of the night just to unplug the darn creature. Serves the melancholy man right.

Other than the fact that our fridge is a complete maniac, things have been going pretty darn swell: free Juice It Up! smoothies as well as pretzels if I ever want a snack in the middle of the day; my philosophy grade owned my gpa (hopefully); I finally had a long-awaited DS rally with my RA and CP of my hall (OWNED IN TETRIS); my DNA fingerprinting presentation went rather smoothly for my forensics class, even though I put everything together an hour before the class started; I have discovered that I would want to be named Raiden (rye-den) instead of Marissa, but then again, I might just have to name my daughter that and be jealous until I die; my calculator watch actually does help me whenever I'm calculating time management with the loads of laundry I have to do; I just went on a very inappropriate shopping spree with money I don't have to buy cute summer dresses and I can blame it all on Francis and Bowie, both of whom are not very good shopping companions when I tell them to restrict me from doing so in the first place; my room is actually getting just a smidgen cleaner by the day; I folded my laundry without Bowie, breaking free from laundry co-dependence issues; I went clubbing for the first time, and I actually just want to forget about that experience because it was the worst experience yet (I don't know why this part is in my list of 'pretty-darn-swell-ness'); and I finally have something to look forward to today.

All in all, pretty darn swell.