slip n'slide

usually it's pretty funny when you witness someone slip or just plain eat it. But it totally sucks major balls when you're actually the klutzy person.

Today, I slipped.

And sure, I could mean that in the most metaphorical sense you can possibly imagine. For example, I slipped and fell into unknown territory when the boy I had been seeing for a few weeks told me he loved me. Or, I slipped into the mode of thinking that eco-friendly notebooks and filler paper would save the world when I saw how disastrous normal notebooks and filler paper are. I mean, there could be plenty of ways to reinvent the phrase "I slipped." And honestly, for once, I wish I did have a metaphorical reason to say those two simplistic words. But I don't. It's purely literal.

Bona fide shit.
I'm talking about I totally just ate it.
Not to mention, it was in the tub.

I seriously am not lying when I was super close to have some sort of liquid come out of my tear ducts. But to tell you the truth, this isn't the first time I've slipped and fell in the shower. It's the second time, yes, I've paid my dues. But that first experience was years ago. Over the past few years, I told myself that it wouldn't hurt so much: I mean, how dangerous could a tub be?

Way dangerous. Everybody get dangerous, everybody get dangerous.

Ladies and gentlemen! Step right up! See the most accident-prone being on the face of the planet! Take a gander at her HUGE red bump on her hip! It will frighten young children, so be warned. This isn't for the faint of heart.

Marissa, you're lame.
Cry me a river.